"We tend to idealize mothers when it comes to sex in that fathers are more likely to be portrayed as being unfaithful and being promiscuous. In reality, though, women in our country are almost as likely as men to commit adultery and are more likely to leave a marriage because they have fallen in love with someone else."-- Dr. Linda Nielsen, President of the American Coalition for Fathers & Children

ACFC President Dr. Linda Nielsen, author of the book Embracing Your Father, wrote an academic paper for the Journal of Divorce & Remarriage called Disenfranchising, Demeaning, and Demoralizing Divorced Dads : A Review of the literature several years ago. One of the paper's most interesting sections is about idealizing mothers and motherhood--to the detriment of fathers.

It is excerpted below. Nielsen has many citations to support her arguments--I have removed them but they can be found on page 5 of her paper.

Idealizing Mothers and Motherhood, to the Detriment of Fathers
Dr. Linda Nielsen

Another way of demoralizing fathers is by representing motherhood in overly idealized ways. For example, mothers are often portrayed as the more virtuous, honest, unselfish, and self-sacrificing parent. And motherhood itself is typically presented as the most perfect, the most intense, and the most ideal love that any adult can have for a child.

Then too, we tend to idealize mothers when it comes to sex in that fathers are more likely to be portrayed as being unfaithful and being promiscuous. In reality, though, women in our country are almost as likely as men to commit adultery and are more likely to leave a marriage because they have fallen in love with someone else.

Many of us also seem to be the most forgiving and most understanding when it is the woman who commits adultery. That is, when a mother commits adultery, we are more likely to tell ourselves that she “couldn’t help it” because she was so lonely or so misunderstood by her husband.

Not surprisingly then, too many children wrongly believe that it was their father, not their mother, who caused the divorce by being unfaithful or by falling in love with someone else. And sadly it seems that too many children end up with little or no relationship with their father after divorce partly because they have such idealistic notions about mothers and motherhood.

To discuss this on my blog, click here.

Wife Tries to Frame Popular Teacher in Custody Dispute--Teacher Is Vindicated

Domestic violence defense expert John McLaughlin of Borders, McLaughlin & Associates sent me the story below about teacher Gregory Abbott (pictured), whose wife apparently tried to frame him. She and/or her boyfriend planted a shotgun and some marijuana in his car while he was at school teaching, and made numerous fake police reports.

Abbott was arrested but, thankfully, the police figured out the ploy and, to their credit, publicly proclaimed the Abbott's innocence

According to McLaughlin, "They are having a custody dispute and she has been trying to set him up for a while."

Anybody wanna wager that she'll end up getting custody? Wouldn't surprise me...

The article is below. I like the way Abbott's students supported him. He must be good with kids--perhaps the judge in the custody case will note that.

Set-up teacher: ‘It turned out better than I thought'
High school teacher Greg Abbott, whom police believe was framed with drugs and gun, says he's grateful for those who believed in him.
By KIMBERLY EDDS
THE ORANGE COUNTY REGISTER, 5/29/08

FULLERTON – The teacher arrested and then cleared in what authorities now describe as an elaborate setup said this morning that his mood had swung from paranoia and fear to gratitude for the support he received.

"It’s hard to describe how I feel right now, going from the lowest low to the highest high within three days," Greg Abbott said in a phone interview. "It turned out better than I thought it would. … It was the best-case scenario."

Police arrested Abbott on Tuesday after finding an unloaded shotgun and marijuana in his Jeep Cherokee in the parking lot at Sunny Hills High School in Fullerton. Authorities now say Abbott was the victim of a plot to bring him down. He does not face any charges.

Police have named Abbott’s wife, Devon E. Abbott, and a male acquaintance as persons of interest.

The Abbotts filed for divorce in February 2007, but the case has not been finalized, according to Orange County Superior Court records. The couple has one child.
There were a flurry of 911 calls to several police agencies urging an investigation of the 31-year-old Placentia man, police said...

"When they arrested me, I was paranoid, worried, scared and trying to figure out what happened, and how it could be," Abbott said. "I didn’t know what was going on until 4 p.m. (Thursday). I thought they were building a case against me."

Abbott said he had received supportive e-mails from students and fellow teachers. He said he was grateful for those who believed in him and supported him.

"My friends, who are teachers, said they were hoping there had been a mistake," he said. "You could tell in their tone that they had a lot of sympathy for what was happening to me."

The case was the talk of Sunny Hills High, where Abbott was a well-liked teacher and former cross country coach. Some students described him as a teacher who knew how to relate to his students.

"I didn't believe it," said student Jocelyn Rodriguez, 16. "He's a very good teacher and all the students like him. He's just cool."

Another student, who ran off to class before giving his name, said he empathized with what Abbott has endured for the past two days.

"I just really thought it was messed up that he was embarrassed like that around school and in the public," he said. "I just didn't think it was fair."

Two calls to the Fullerton Police Department this week named Abbott as a criminal suspect. One identified him in a road rage incident and the other labeled him a drug trafficker...

No arrests have been made, but felony charges could be filed in connection with lying to the police and conspiring to plant evidence.

Read the full article here.

To discuss this issue on my blog, click here.

A Divorced Dad Song from the 1950s

"The last time I saw Marie she was waving me goodbye / With hurry home drops on her cheek that trickled from her eye / Marie is only six years old, information please / Try to put me through to her in Memphis, Tennessee"

I'd been hearing the song "Memphis, Tennessee" by Elvis Presley, Chuck Berry and others for decades without ever realizing what Berry, the song's author, was talking about. It's actually a divorced dad song about a father's severed relationship with his 6-year-old girl, Marie. Ned Holstein of Fathers & Families pointed it out to me the other day, and I felt stupid for not having realized it before.

The lyrics to the song are below, along with a video of Chuck Berry performing it. If you prefer Elvis, you can hear that by clicking here.

We'll add it to our list of divorced dad songs which includes: Craig Morgan's Every Friday Afternoon, Trace Adkins' I'm Tryin', Doug Supernaw's I Don't Call Him Daddy, Toby Keith's Who's That Man?, Tim McGraw's Do You Want Fries With That?, and Sting's I'm So Happy I Can't Stop Crying, which was also later recorded by Toby Keith.

Memphis, Tennessee
(Words & Music by Chuck Berry)

Long distance information give me Memphis, Tennessee
Help me find the party trying to get in touch with me
She could not leave her number but I know who placed the call
My uncle took the message and he wrote it on the wall

Help me information to get in touch with my Marie
She's the only one who'd phone me here from Memphis, Tennessee
Her home is on the Southside, high upon a ridge
Just a half a mile from the Mississippi bridge

Help me information more than that I cannot add
Only that I miss her and all the fun we had
But we were pulled apart because her mom did not agree
Tore apart our happy home in Memphis, Tennessee

The last time I saw Marie she was waving me goodbye
With hurry home drops on her cheek that trickled from her eye
Marie is only six years old, information please
Try to put me through to her in Memphis, Tennessee

To discuss this issue on my blog, click here.

Danica Patrick--Spoiled Brat or Getting a Bad Rap?

From IRL's most marketable driver needs attitude adjustment (FOXSports.com, 5/26/08):

"Danica Patrick entered the Indianapolis 500 with confidence in her abilities and her Andretti Green Racing crew.

"But once the checkered flag waved...she looked ready to pick a fight — no matter whether it was another driver or a member of her own team.

"...Ryan Briscoe ran into her on pit road with 29 laps remaining. With her car's rear suspension mangled beyond repair, the 5-foot-2 racer got out of the car and went straight for Briscoe's Team Penske pit stall.

"If not for security crews directing her away from her destination, she may have tried to go through every one of them to get to their Australian driver.

"'It is probably best that I didn't get down there anyway, isn't it?,' she said after the race...

"After running into Briscoe...Her anger boiled over. Patrick may or may not be right in her beliefs about her race-ending accident, but with her attention-grabbing march toward the Penske pits, she gave her critics more ammunition to back their assertions that she is nothing more than an over-hyped, under-talented driver that turns petulant when things don't go her way."

This isn't the first time Danica has done something like this--there was a similar incident last year.

In Defense of Danica

Robert, a reader, says Danica is getting a bad rap. He writes:

"Tony Stewart has been penalized so many times for such actions that it's got to be coming soon to Saturday Night Live. How about AJ Foyt Jr. (not AJ IV), he was probably one of the original 'Bad Boys,' or Dale Earnhadt Sr...

"If I were Danica, and had some bone-head drives across multiple lanes like some idiot in 5:00 traffic, I'd be fuming too, especially if I had been fighting an ill-handling car for 3 hours prior to that, and managed only to hold ground (then again this year was a duel of maintaining momentum, no real dominant cars, so to win you had to minimize errors).

"There comes a time in the sport where you have to at the very least put on the public face that you will fight (figuratively) for your position on the track, otherwise you will soon enough get run over (literally) by every other competitor, less so in open wheel, but nonetheless true."

Spoiled Brat or Getting a Bad Rap?

As for Estrada's view that Danica Patrick is a spoiled brat, well, I've never liked that stereotype about professional athletes. It is certainly true that professional athletes are privileged in many ways, but they've also had to make great sacrifices and often face many hazards.

The "spoiled brat" slur usually is thrown at athletes who speak out against management, demand more pay, criticize alleged racism, or support their sport's union. Often the players are correct. (This was particularly true during the 1981 baseball players' strike--a righteous sports strike if there ever was one.) The "spoiled brat" view is usually espoused by people who have no concept of how hard professional athletes have to work, and how many hurdles they have to overcome.

I'm not sure if Patrick is that talented--I know little about pro racing--but she certainly has had to work hard and face many hazards. On the other hand, if there were ever any athlete who would be a spoiled brat, she might qualify--young and privileged by success, fame, and beauty. I'm sure she's a perfectly decent person, but perhaps a mentor figure in her organization needs to give her a bit of a come-to-Jesus speech about these outbursts.

To discuss this issue on my blog, click here.

Parent Defends Florida Teacher Who Humiliated Autistic Kindergartener

In two recent blog posts I discussed the case of Wendy Portillo, a Florida kindergarten teacher who publicly humiliated an autistic five-year-old boy who was one of her students. To learn more, see my posts Teacher Forces 'the Only Friend the Five-Year-Old Boy Has Ever Made' to Denounce Him Publicly and Teacher Who Humiliated Autistic Kindergartener Is 'Reassigned'.

Below, "Arlene," a reader who says her son was in Portillo's class last year, writes in to defend the embattled teacher. Arlene writes:

"My son was in her class last year and she is a wonderful teacher. Unless you know her you have no idea how she is or who she is. I think it's a shame that this little boy can be mean to the other students in class and have nothing done to him because a Dr. just now since this happened said he has a problem. So when he gets older and if he hurts some one with more than just words it will be ok because he has a problem .

"My friend's child is in his class this year and she agrees with me. Her child comes home all the time and tells her what mean things he did or said to her that day . But again that's ok cause he has a problem.

"If I was a parent of one of the those students in his class. I would press charges against his parents for their son bullying and being mean to them. It is no different then Mrs. Portillo letting the kids tell him how he makes them feel. This has upset my child who loves and misses Mrs. Portillo which in return upsets me. I wish the best of luck to Mrs. Portillo. She is in my prayers."

Portillo is defending her action regarding the student--to learn more, see Florida kindergarten teacher defends having class vote 5-year-old out (Chicago Sun-Times, 5/29/08).

The incident report on the case, which includes an interview with Portillo, can be seen here.  The authorities decided that a criminal case on the crime of Child Abuse is not warranted.

To discuss this issue on my blog, click here.

Child Support Agent: 'The private child support industry is plagued by rogue agencies'

"..until the private agency got involved – admittedly using unsavory practices – the non-custodial parents were not paying child support on a regular basis or at all."--Michael 'Doc' McCoy, former director, CSI 

"The Child Support Agent's Viewpoint" is authored by Michael 'Doc' McCoy, a prominent former child support official and one of the pioneers of the private child support collection industry.

McCoy was the Founder and Managing Director of Child Support Intervention (CSI) in Fort Worth, TX from 1991 to 2002, and held a leadership position in the American Child Support Collection Association from 1993 to 1999. He retired from CSI in 2002 and currently lives in China. He has often been a commenter on www.glennsacks.com under the name "Doc."
 
McCoy has on occasion been a critic of the private child support industry and an internal reformer--to learn more, see SmartMoney magazine's Mother's Little Helpers (8/2/02). McCoy's post for this week is below.

A Private Child Support Agency's Scam
By Michael 'Doc' McCoy

No one really knows how many private child support enforcement or collection agencies are in business around the country. It would be safe to say that there are most likely at least a couple dozen such agencies in existence.

The first thing to remember is that these types of agencies do exist because there is a need for them. If people were not delinquent in their child support obligations, for whatever reasons, and the states were efficiently and effectively addressing the problems, people would not feel it is necessary to turn to a private agency.

Glenn recently posted about an Atlanta TV station's investigation of a private child support collection agency (Atlanta TV Station Investigates Abusive Practices by Private Child Support Collectors). All in all, the investigation of this agency was fair and balanced, and I have no complaints about that coverage. In short, the agency not only needed to be investigated, but also closed down without delay.

One thing that was not clearly noted in the report, however, was the fact that until the private agency got involved – admittedly using unsavory practices – the non-custodial parents were not paying child support on a regular basis or at all. The custodial parents featured were actively looking for someone to help them collect the child support. They thought that they contacted the state agency, but instead contacted the private agency in question – Child Support Services of Atlanta aka Child Support Services of Georgia.

Who is to blame? Clearly, the private agency involved deserves a significant portion of the blame. What they are doing is unconscionable and illegal under a number of different laws. But, the blame needs to be distributed to other sectors as well.

The State of Georgia also needs to shoulder some of the blame. In short, if they were doing their job as they should be, there would not be a need for parents to look for alternative services. Admittedly, in the story presented, it could be argued that the parents involved were not looking for a private agency. However, little sympathy can be garnered for someone who does not fully read a contract before signing it. If the non-custodial parent is being forced or intimidated into signing a contract, then this of course is illegal.

The State of Georgia also deserves additional blame because of its refusal to work with the private sector. This refusal provides unscrupulous individuals with incentive to violate not only court orders but also the law. It is noted that because the State of Georgia would not work with or allow private agencies to be involved in the collection process, CSI would not accept any cases that originated or were based in Georgia as well as other states that will not cooperate with private agencies.

The private child support industry as a whole also needs to shoulder part of the blame, though in a different way. Unfortunately, the association that some private agencies are members of does not look out for the welfare of the industry as it should be doing. They could do this by actively going after rogue agencies, such as this one, and taking actions against those agencies either independently or through state agencies.

The following, to use the catch phrase of the character Will Sonnett in The Guns of Will Sonnett, played by Walter Brennan is “No brag. Just fact.”

The private industry has long been plagued by rogue agencies.

To read more and to discuss this issue on my blog, click here.

If a GUY Did This...

...they would've lynched him. Attempts and/or completed sexual conduct with numerous 14-year-old girls by a 47-year-old school teacher, who plied the girls with alcohol to get them drunk.

The maximum sentence for this crime--meaning the one that men get, not women--is 20 years. Factor in the female sentencing discount--a generous dose at that--and she gets off without going to prison.

According to Substitute teacher must register as sex offender (The Enterprise, 5/29/08):

"The 47-year-old woman, Kerry Smith Foulk of Port Neches, pleaded guilty Tuesday to felony charges of indecency with a child for engaging in sexual contact with a 14-year-old girl in September 2006...

"The abuse, which occurred at Foulk's home, was not an isolated incident, Jefferson County prosecutor Pat Knauth said. 

"'After this student made an outcry, others came forward,' Knauth said in a phone conversation Wednesday, explaining Foulk's activity with other girls did not rise to criminal levels.

"The substitute teacher had a history of befriending girls in classes she taught, the prosecutor said, allowing girls to stay nights at her house.

"'She would provide alcohol to them, talk about sex with them, try to get them drunk,' Knauth said. 'It was obvious, at least to me, that she was grooming these other girls but that the other girls stepped out of the situation before something could happen.'"

Read the full article here. Thanks to Wayne, a reader, for the story.

To discuss this issue on my blog, click here.

Hero Father Dies Saving His Sons from Rough Ocean Waters

From Local attorney dies helping his sons escape rip currents on Hutchinson Island (5/27/08):

"Well-known Fort Pierce real estate attorney Robert N. 'Bobby' Klein died Monday while trying to help his sons escape rough ocean waters.

"He and his family were spending Memorial Day morning at Bob Graham Beach when his two sons, ages 11 and 14, were caught in strong rip currents.

"Klein, 49, swam out to help them and got caught in the currents, said Martin County Fire Rescue Bureau Chief Jeff Alter. Rescue workers brought Klein to shore and tried to revive him. Klein was pronounced dead...

"Klein and his family were at the beach, which has no lifeguards, in the early morning. The boys struggled in the rip currents while riding their Boogie boards about 50 yards offshore, said an eyewitness, Walter Walsh of Port St. Lucie.

"Their father went to their rescue, Alter said.

"Walsh said he saw Klein struggling in the currents...

"As rescue workers tried to revive Klein, Walsh said, Klein's wife was standing next to him, saying, 'Bob, we need you. Bob, don't go.'"

We will add Klein to our list of Hero Fathers, which includes:

1) Joseph Richardson--see my blog post Hero Father Dies Saving Daddy's Little Girl 

2) Albert Collins--see my blog post Heroic Father Gunned Down While Saving His Little Daughter

3) James Kim--see my blog post Father 'put himself through a desperate ordeal in a superhuman effort to save his family'

Thanks to Steven, a reader, for sending the story.

To discuss this issue on my blog, click here.

A Good New Jersey Court Decision for Fathers

"Non-custodial parents are often given very little time with infants. Often, there are no overnights. So this decision could be an important tool to help fathers get more time with their children, including overnights, once the children grow into toddlers."

Ned Holstein of Fathers & Families has a good post on a recent New Jersey court decision that's good for fathers. In Appellate Court Decision Opens the Door for More Parenting Time, Holstein writes:

"The family courts are schizophrenic about letting you return to court after they have decided your case. On the one hand, they say that any factor that affects the best interests of the child can be brought before the court at any time. On the other hand, they don’t want everybody coming back, and coming back, and coming back. So they say there must be a 'material change in circumstances' before they will agree to hear the case.

"In an April 17, 2008 decision, the New Jersey Appellate Division decided that the aging of a child in and of itself was a sufficient change of circumstances to warrant a change in the father’s parenting time. (Swicinski v. Maul).

"The original parenting time decision was made in 2003, when the child was six weeks old. The father had the infant every week from Sunday morning until Monday at 6:00pm. The father came back for additional parenting time in 2007.

"Both the Trial Court and the Appellate Division agreed that parenting time for an infant should be different than parenting time for a four-year old, and gave Dad more time."

Read Holstein's full post here.

To discuss this issue on my blog, click here.

Indiana Kindergarten Teacher Tells Five-Year-Old Boy 'You Are Pathetic'

In my recent blog posts Teacher Forces 'the Only Friend the Five-Year-Old Boy Has Ever Made' to Denounce Him Publicly and Teacher Who Humiliated Autistic Kindergartener Is 'Reassigned', I discussed a Florida kindergarten teacher's emotional abuse of one of her students.

Along the same lines, in the recent ABC News video Teacher Gone Too Far, Indiana kindergarten teacher Kristen Woodward berates five-year-old Gabriel Ross, a kindergarten boy. The teacher calls the boy "ignorant, selfish, self-absorbed" in front of the whole class and says, "You are pathetic! If me saying these words to you hurt, I hope it does."

The boy can be heard crying on the tape. The teacher then asks the class, "Is that somebody you want to be with?" and the other students reply, "Noooo."

The teacher adds:

"See, your friend doesn't want to be with you."

Given the boy crisis in education, it is absolutely no surprise that in both of these cases the victims were boys--five-year-old boys stuck in school environments that don't suit little boys, and which set them up to be behavior problems.

To watch the video, click here.

To learn more about the boy crisis, see my column The 'Boy Parent Dilemma' (Los Angeles Daily News, 9/6/02)

Thanks to Kurt, a reader, for the story.

To discuss this issue on my blog, click here.

Columnist: Men's Rights' Activists Will Use New Report on Women's Domestic Violence in 'Poisonous Deceit'

Research consistently shows that women are at least as likely as men to initiate and engage in domestic violence, and that a significant minority of the injuries sustained in domestic violence are suffered by heterosexual men. This research is increasingly coming to light, for a few reasons:

1) Dissident domestic violence experts have worked hard to stick to science and solid research methods in the face of tremendous pressure. Many of these attended the Sacramento Domestic Violence conference From Ideology to Inclusion: Evidence-Based Policy and Intervention in Domestic Violence in February. (Dr. Jennifer Langhinrichsen-Rohling, one of the speakers from that conference, is pictured above. To learn more, click here. Photo by Kevin Graft.)

2) The feminists' media stranglehold on gender issues has weakened somewhat.

3) Advocates for male victims of domestic violence have done fine and effective work.

4) As Shakespeare noted in The Merchant of Venice, "At the length truth will out."

When confronted with the unwelcome news that women are as much a part of family violence as men are, feminists use several evasion tactics. One is to claim that the data is faulty, though that has largely worn thin and has been replaced with claims that female violence is somehow "different," or more justified. That one is also starting to wear thin, too. (See Dr. Langhinrichsen-Rohling's views in 'Every time we tried to say that women's intimate partner abuse is different than men's, the evidence did not support it')

Another one--not new, but increasingly prominent--is to say that evidence of women's violence is being misused to promote a misogynist agenda. A subset of this latter argument is what I've described as the "Feminist Intentional Walk"--when feminists ignore credible men's advocates and instead quote some obscure loony in order to discredit all of us.

One example of this can be found in Janice Kennedy's recent Ottawa Citizen opinion column We can't help victims of violence if hatemongers hijack the agenda (5/25/08). Kennedy grapples with the fact that a recent study found that a significant amount of men are victims of domestic violence.

Kennedy could have quoted or cited any one of dozens of credible advocates on the subject, but since her intent was to stigmatize rather than edify, she reached way, way down and came up with an individual named Kirby Inwood. No, I'd never heard of him either, but his website features gems like this:

"I have consistently found women lawyers to generally be the scum of the earth."

"If you don't like what I say, you must be a blind, feminist bigot or a male collaborating white ribbon wimp."
Kennedy adds that Inwood was once convicted of "assault on his wife and infant son." (I don't know the details on the case, and it is possible it was one of those domestic violence railroad jobs.)

Anyway, in palming off Inwood's comments as somehow representative of men's activists, she writes, "There are many public purveyors of misogyny, but one colorfully venomous Canadian example sums them up. Kirby Inwood." She adds, "The 'men's rights' activists, are going to gobble [the new report] up and spit it out again in a malignancy of poisonous deceit."

So instead of quoting the many, many experts who have researched and quantified women's family violence, we're instead supposed to focus on this obscure loony. That's weak journalism on Kennedy's part, to say the least.

To discuss this issue on my blog, click here.

[Note: If you or someone you love is being abused, the Domestic Abuse Helpline for Men and Women provides crisis intervention and support services to victims of domestic violence and their families.] 

Dr. Warren Farrell's Shared Parenting Evidence Kit--What You Need to Win Shared Physical Custody Dr. Warren Farrell, a top expert on children of divorce now offers a complete evidence kit to help you win shared custody.  The DVDs, audio CD and electronic files summarize the best scientific research available collected over decades.  Scientific research has proven that children do far better with near equal time with both parents with minimal conditions.  This video set was developed to educate parents, judges, lawyers, psychologists and other divorce professionals. Most judges are doing exactly what is worst for children with sole-custody.  Submitted as evidence this will maximize your chances. Divorce Reform groups call(508) 381-1450 to use as fundraiser. www.BestInterestofChildren.org

Help for Michigan Dads Michigan family law attorney Mindy L. Hitchcock has experience fighting for noncustodial parents against Michigan's abusive FOC. Her holistic approach to divorce gets results for her clients while avoiding the scorched earth approach to law that leaves families emotionally and financially devastated. Lady4Justice.com

Teen Boy Target of Outrageous Misuse of Child Pornography Laws

Criminal defense attorney Douglas R. Slain (pictured) has a great post about an outrageous misuse of child pornography laws. The target, of course, is male--in this case Alex Phillips, a 17-year old high school student from La Crosse, Wisconsin. Slain writes:

"Phillips may not be the brightest crayon in the box, but his story is one that once again calls into question the legislative sanity of some of the overreach of our laws regarding what constitutes 'child pornography.'

"It turns out that Phillips at some point in the last year was friendly with a 16-year old girl called HLK (14 months his junior) who sent him two explicit photos of her completely naked in different positions. She took the photos with her cell phone camera and sent them to his email address. Phillips, apparently miffed that HLK had started seeing someone else recently, decided to post the photos (with lewd captions) to his MySpace account."

I condemn Phillips' vindictive spurned lover routine, but authorities went way, way overboard here. Phillips is being charged with two felonies--possession of child pornography and sexual exploitation of a child under 18 years of age. Both of these are wildly inappropriate for the situation. (He's also being charged with misdemeanor defamation, which I think is fair.)

The Phillips case is another example of law enforcement using laws designed to entrap adults who are exploiting children as a way of punishing/jailing teen boys. Child pornography laws are supposed to target adult men exploiting 9-year-old children. They aren't supposed to target teen lovers.

Similarly, statutory rape laws--whose purpose is to prevent 30-year-old men from having sex with 15-year-old girls--are increasingly being used to target teen boys who have sex with girls who are in similar age brackets. One good example can be found here.

Read more of Slain's commentary about Alex Phillips here.

To discuss this issue on my blog, click here.

Teacher Who Humiliated Autistic Kindergartener Is 'Reassigned'

From St. Lucie teacher has students vote on whether 5-year-old can stay in class (TCPalm.com, 5/23/08):

"Melissa Barton said she is considering legal action after her son's kindergarten teacher led his classmates to vote him out of class.

"After each classmate was allowed to say what they didn't like about Barton's 5-year-old son, Alex (pictured), his Morningside Elementary teacher said they were going to take a vote, Barton said.

"By a 14 to 2 margin, the class voted him out of the class.

"Barton said her son is in the process of being diagnosed with Aspberger's, a type of high-functioning autism...

"Alex has had disciplinary issues because of his disabilities, Barton said. The school and district has met with Barton and her son to create an individual education plan, she said. His teacher, Wendy Portillo, has attended these meetings, she said...

"'He was incredibly upset,' Barton said. 'The only friend he has ever made in his life was forced to do this.'"

In my recent blog post on the subject, Teacher Forces 'the Only Friend the Five-Year-Old Boy Has Ever Made' to Denounce Him Publicly, I wrote:

"As a former teacher, I certainly know the challenges that teachers often face, and I also realize how incidents which seem innocent and humorous in the classroom can sound ominous or harmful when relayed second or third or fourth hand to administrators or parents. That being said, if this news article is accurate, there's no defense of what Wendy Portillo did in humiliating this little boy...

"Sometimes a child will act up or act very strangely in class and the teacher may get in trouble later for disciplining the child or mishandling the situation because the child, unbeknownst to the teacher, had special needs or special issues.  In this case, however, Wendy Portillo knew all about the special problems this boy had-- she had attended meetings where the boy's disability was discussed and plans were made on how to help him...

"It is true that teachers are human like anybody else and can lose their temper in a difficult situation like anybody else.  However, what Wendy Portillo did went far, far beyond losing her temper. This was hardly a short, quickly regretted outburst, but instead prolonged psychological abuse of the little boy."

Apparently teacher, Wendy Portillo, has now been reassigned. According to St. Lucie teacher reassigned after student 'voted out' of class (TCPalm.com, 5/27/08):

"Morningside Elementary kindergarten teacher Wendy Portillo has been reassigned until further action may be determined, according to St. Lucie County School District spokeswoman Janice Karst...Portillo was reassigned out of the classroom at the district offices on Friday, as soon as Schools Superintendent Michael Lannon heard about the incident, Karst said. She said it could be up to two weeks before the district's investigation on the matter is concluded.

"Portillo has been a St. Lucie County teacher for 12 years, and at Morningside Elementary for nine, Karst said."

The mother thinks Portillo should be fired, saying, "She has no business being near children at all" and that Portillo's reassignment is "a slap in the face."

MSNBC has a video on the case--Autistic Boy Voted out of Class. It'll be interesting to see how the case is resolved, and also to see if and how the teachers' union gets involved.

Thanks to Ana, a reader, for sending the new story.

To discuss this issue on my blog, click here.

Does Parental Alienation Play a Role in 12-Year-Old's Sex Change Operation?

From Family's fury as girl, 12, allowed to have sex-change operation without against father's wishes (Evening Standard, 5/25/08):

"A huge ethical row has erupted over a judge's decision to allow a 12- year-old girl to have a sex change that will turn her into a teenage boy.

"The child's father, who is separated from her mother, is outraged at the prospect but despite his objections the taxpayer-funded sex swap has already got under way.

"His daughter, who cannot be named because of her age, is already having hormone treatment in Australia in what is one of the first such cases involving a child so young...a relative of the child claimed the girl had been 'vindictively brainwashed' by her mother into making the decision to have the change.

"A cousin who stayed with the girl's family for two and a half years said yesterday that after a bitter break-up the mother had used the child to 'get back' at the father.

"'She's been brainwashed from an early age,' said the cousin, who has to remain anonymous to protect the Victorian girl's identity.

"'The mother drilled into the girl from an early age that she would have preferred a boy.'

"Now the father, who considers his daughter is far too young to make a decision on her gender, is appealing to Melbourne's legal fraternity for help in fighting the case after he ran out of money to afford representation in opposing the sex swap request."

A few thoughts:

1) I think this girl is way, way too young to be making a decision like this.  I know that the proponents of this believe that by doing it now, they can make it much easier for her to change from a female into a male.  On the other hand, there is no way that a 12-year-old is capable of making an informed, intelligent decision on a matter this grave and important.

2) I believe that for any decision of this magnitude, there has to be agreement between the parents, assuming that both parents are fit.  For one parent to be able to do this against the will and the objections of the other parent is wrong.

3) I would very much like to know more about the allegations that the girl's cousin makes about her being alienated from her father, brainwashed at an early age, and cut off from half of her family.

4) Assuming the father is as this article portrays him, he has been placed in a horrible position. I'm sure he probably feels that if the girl could just come to his house and be with him, dad could take care of his little girl and all of these other weighty, adult issues would be resolved.  He probably believes that it never would have come to this had he been allowed to be a regular part of the girl's life. That may or may not be correct, but that's probably how he feels.

Thanks to James, a reader, for sending me the story.

To discuss this issue on my blog, click here.

Dr. Linda Nielsen: Shared Parenting: Facts and Fictions

"[Shared Parenting] is an issue which knows no bounds. It is neither the domain of conservatives or liberals, poor or wealthy, and pays no attention to ethnicity or sex. Our issues cross all demographics and our goals are shared, and should be supported, across all sectors of our society."--Mike McCormick, Executive Director of the American Coalition for Fathers & Children

ACFC President Dr. Linda Nielsen, author of the book Embracing Your Father, recently penned a pamphlet called Shared Parenting: Facts and Fictions. Some of the "Facts and Fictions" Nielsen lists include:

"Fiction: Most children are satisfied with the amount of time they spend (or spent) with their fathers after their parents divorce.

"Fact: The vast majority of children say they want - or wanted - more time with their fathers after their parents stopped living together. Kids want more shared parenting.

"Fiction: As long as the mother has enough money, children don't pay a price for having too little or no contact with their father.

"Fact: Kids with too little fathering are more likely to have problems throughout their lives related to father absence than kids whose fathers remained actively involved after the parents stop living together.

"Fiction: Shared parenting is bad for infants or young children because they should not be separated overnight from their mother.

"Fact: Very young children should not be away from either parent for more than a few days and are able to spend nights in each parent’s home.

"Fiction: When parents share parenting, children are worse off financially because their dad pays much less child support.

"Fact: Fathers who share parenting are the most likely to pay child support, spend additional money on their kids, and contribute to college educations."

To read the full pamphlet, including Nielsen's list of research citations, click here.

To discuss this issue on my blog, click here.

What's the REAL Significance of Obama's Nazi Gaffe?

The latest stupid, petty controversy in the presidential primaries/election is people being "outraged"--and the Republicans demanding an explanation--for Senator Obama confusing Auschwitz with Buchenwald in a recent speech. According to the Associated Press' Obama mistaken on name of Nazi death camp (5/28/08):

"The Barack Obama campaign said Tuesday the candidate mistakenly referred to the wrong Nazi death camp when relating the story of a great uncle who helped liberate the camps in World War II.

"The Democratic presidential candidate said the story is accurate except that the camp was Buchenwald, not Auschwitz...

"Obama's mistaken mention of the camp on Monday quickly generated Internet chatter, ranging from puzzlement to outrage. The Republican Party demanded an explanation.

"'It was Soviet troops that liberated Auschwitz, so unless his uncle was serving in the Red Army, there's no way Obama's statement yesterday can be true,' said Alex Conant, a spokesman for the Republican National Committee."

So Obama--who must be so tired from the endless, endless, endless campaigning that he can probably barely see straight--confused the names of two concentration camps. Big deal--most Americans couldn't even name two concentration camps.

But the real significance of the gaffe is this--"'It was Soviet troops that liberated Auschwitz, so unless his uncle was serving in the Red Army, there's no way Obama's statement yesterday can be true,' said Alex Conant, a spokesman for the Republican National Committee."

An ironic comment, to say the least. American conservatives have spent the last 60 years pretending it was the US and Britain who defeated Nazi Germany, when the vast majority of Nazi Germany's casualties occurred on the eastern front, against the USSR. When celebrating the 40th anniversary of D-Day in 1984, then-president Ronald Reagan read General Eisenhower's announcement for the day and deliberately omitted Eisenhower's reference to America's Soviet allies.

The first president to properly acknowledge the Soviet role--the leading Soviet role--was Clinton, not because he was more honest but because the Cold War was over so we could stop the stupid charade. It was that generation of Russians--28 million of whom died in World War II, and millions of whom also died at the hands of their own dictatorship--who saved humanity.

The picture above is of the Soviet Army liberating Auschwitz.

Thanks to Valerie, a reader, for sending the story.

To discuss this issue on my blog, click here.

Best Wishes,
Glenn Sacks
GlennSacks.com

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