The promo for this week's His Side--"Keeping Your Marriage Together"--is below. If you have a problem in your marriage you'd like our guests' expert opinion on, e-mail me at Glenn@HisSide.com or call the show and join the discussion in progress at 1-800-439-4805 (lines open this Sunday from 5-6PM PST).

For those who are outside of our radio stations' coverage ranges, you can listen to the show live this Sunday (1/16/05) via our station's excellent Internet stream at Listen Live.

His Side with Glenn Sacks can be heard on WSNR AM 620 in New York City and North-Eastern New Jersey, and on WWZN AM 1510 in Boston on Sundays at 10 PM EST. The show can also be heard in Southern California on KTIE AM 590 at 5 PM PST.

According to Fox News there is a new trend towards father-positive advertising and the protests of activists, including the His Side Campaign Against Anti-Father Verizon Commercial (11/7/04-11/30/04), have had an impact. See Dad's in Charge in New TV Ads (1/10/05) and Fatherhood Activists Protest TV Ad (11/9/04). The article cites several recent ads with positive depictions of fathers caring for their children.

Fox also quotes Vincent DiCaro of the National Fatherhood Initiative, which is ironic because the NFI has done some father-bashing advertising of its own--see my co-authored column National Fatherhood Initiative's Ad Campaign Insults African-American Fathers (Pasadena Star-News & Affiliated Papers, 6/14/03, Daily Breeze [Los Angeles], 5/25/04) and listen to National Fatherhood Initiative Attacks Black Fathers (4/25/04) (audio available).

Three years ago this week a distraught father struggling with overdue child support obligations and adverse family court decisions committed suicide on the steps of the downtown San Diego courthouse. Angrily waving court documents, 43 year-old Derrick Miller walked up to court personnel at the entrance, said "You did this to me," and shot himself in the head.

Activist Harry Crouch of the Coalition of Parent Support later researched Miller's case and determined that before Miller committed suicide his child support has been raised sharply, obligating him to pay 80% of his income. Some of you may remember my newspaper column on it, Distraught Father's Courthouse Suicide Highlights America's Male Suicide Epidemic (San Diego Union-Tribune, 1/11/02, Pasadena Star-News & Affiliated Papers, 1/31/02).

There's a good, though understated article on the boy crisis in education in the Detroit News this week--Boys fall behind girls in grades: Classroom cultures that favor female students and an increase in learning disabilities may explain the academic gap (1/9/05). The article discusses how modern classrooms are mismatched with boys' natures and needs. To learn more, see my columns Start of School Very Different for Parents of Boys, Parents of Girls (Washington Times, Albuquerque Journal, Omaha World-Herald, 9/12/04) and Boys: The New Underclass in American Schools (Los Angeles Daily Journal, San Francisco Daily Journal, 4/15/02).

The audio archive of last Sunday evening's show--NBA Vet Pays $90,000 in Child Support But is Imprisoned Anyway--can be found here. You can read Fayne Williams' letter on behalf of her imprisoned husband here.

My latest column, "New Report on Maternal Homicide Crisis: Myth-Making and Manbashing" (Lexington Herald-Leader, 1/3/05) criticizes the highly publicized three-part series on maternal homicides which ran in the Washington Post and many other newspapers recently.

As I discussed on the show, Andrea Yates' murder conviction for the drowning of her five children was just overturned. During and after the Yates trial I was surprised at how many people wanted to pin the blame for the murders on her husband, Russell Yates. As far as I know, my column, In Defense of a Flawed but Decent Russell Yates (Houston Chronicle, 3/11/02), was the only op-ed to appear in a  major American newspaper at the time to defend Russell.

I also appeared on many Texas radio shows at the time defending Russell. The "Andrea is a victim, blame Russell" mentality was so thick--particularly among men--that I often felt as if I were defending a murderer instead of a man whose principal crime was to go to work each day and support his wife and children.

The continual refrain was "he shouldn't have left her alone with those kids," ignoring the fact that Russell's mother, Dora Yates, watched the children from 10 AM each morning until Russell came home. Andrea Yates was only alone with the children from 9 AM to 10 AM, yet somehow Russell was supposed to expect that on the morning of June 20, 2001 Andrea was waiting to hear Russell's car pull away so she could begin to fill the bathtub and be done before Dora arrived.

I wrote a column on maternal filicide shortly after the Yates murders--Female Murderers Seen in a Different Light: Society Prefers to View Violent Women as Victims (Pasadena Star-News & Affiliated Papers, 7/5/01).

We just crossed the 1,000,000 visit mark on www.GlennSacks.com and www.HisSide.com--thanks to all of you who have been so supportive.

The American Coalition for Fathers and Children (ACFC) promotes family law reform on a national level, and can help all parties affected by family breakup.  If you are having problems with custody, visitation, child support or related problems, visit their website at www.acfc.org or call (800) 978-3237.

If you own a business or professional practice and are interested in advertising on the show, please contact Advertise@HisSide.com. To support the advertisers who support His Side, go to His Side Advertisers.

To learn how to have CDs of all His Side shows for six months mailed to you, click here. 

As always, all information about the show can be found at HisSide.com. I welcome your comments and suggestions.

Best Wishes,
Glenn Sacks
Listen to His Side with Glenn Sacks
GlennSacks.com

Keeping Your Marriage Together

It would be hard to overestimate the amount of pain and misery that result from modern divorce, particularly for children. My e-mail is usually jammed with letters from aggrieved and often desperate people who have been chewed up by divorce and family court. Shared parenting advocates, divorce reformers and fatherhood activists are 100% correct in fighting for a divorce regime that is more child-centered, equitable, and respectful of the loving bonds children share with both parents.

However, an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure. When I set aside time to answer my listener and reader mail I often tell my wife "I'm going to go climb down into the sewer now." While dredging through the seemingly endless stream of broken families and broken hearts I often think "what can we do to prevent some of these damn divorces from happening to begin with?"

This week on His Side a psychologist who counsels troubled married couples and a mediator who does both pre-marital and divorce mediation will discuss how men and women can keep their marriages together.

Psychotherapist Stephen Johnson Ph.D. of the Men's Center Los Angeles and divorce mediator Diana Mercer, J.D., author of Your Divorce Advisor, will join Glenn on His Side with Glenn Sacks on Sunday, January 16 at 5 PM PST/8 PM EST. If you have a problem in your marriage you'd like our guests' expert opinion on, e-mail Glenn at Glenn@HisSide.com or call the show and join the discussion in progress at 1-800-439-4805 (lines open this Sunday from 5-6PM PST).

For those who are outside of our radio stations' coverage ranges, you can listen to the show live via our station's excellent Internet stream at Listen Live.

To learn more about how to keep your marriage together, don't ask Glenn because he doesn't know. However, Johnson and Mercer do--see:

• Stephen Johnson's The Relationship Journey: A Map for a Bumpy Road

• Rekindling a Loving Relationship: Is the love lost or just misplaced?

• She Says You Don't Communicate

• Diana Mercer on how premarital mediation can help you plan and think through your marriage

• The His Side show Men, Marriage, and 'Finding your Nuts' (Nonnegotiable, Unalterable Terms)'  (7/20/03)

His Side with Glenn Sacks can be heard on WSNR AM 620 in New York City and North-Eastern New Jersey, and on WWZN AM 1510 in Boston on Sundays at 10 PM EST. The show can also be heard in Southern California on KTIE AM 590 at 5 PM PST. To listen live via the Internet from anywhere in the world, go to Listen Live. Both radio and Internet listeners are encouraged to call and participate in the show live and on the air at 1-800-439-4805 (lines open Sundays from 5-6PM PST). All callers will be mailed a free CD of the show in which they appeared at their request.

GlennSacks.com / HisSide.com

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