New Column: Abortion Bill Assumes Male Guilt, Opens Door to Unfair Prosecutions

December 5, 2006

 
An Incredibly Bad Bill...

New Column: Coercive Abortion Prevention Act Assumes Male Guilt, Opens Door to Unfair Prosecutions

My new co-authored column, Coercive Abortion Prevention Act Assumes Male Guilt, Opens Door to Unfair Prosecutions (Detroit News,11/30/06), discusses an incredible--and incredibly bad--new bill which was passed by the Michigan House of Representatives. We squared off against Suanne Thompson, legislative liaison for Right to Life of Michigan, whose counterpoint was Women need protection from undue pressure to have abortions.

I've made the point many times that our movement has advanced slowly in part because we face opposition from both sides of the political spectrum. While most of the anti-male prejudice in our society comes from the feminist left, the CAPA is an excellent example of the way conservatives also bash and blame men, and try to shift blame for society's ills onto us.

Family law attorney Jeff Leving and I wrote:

"Bob and Jane live together and, like many young couples, they sometimes argue. There never seems to be enough money, and while they both want to go to

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college, neither has yet been able to do so. Jane recently discovered that she is pregnant.

"Jane is ambivalent about the pregnancy, and her friends think she should terminate it -- she's too young, and Bob isn't very stable. Bob would like to be a father someday, but not now -- he can't pay their bills and wants a better career.

"One day Bob and Jane argue over some things Jane bought with their credit card, and Bob tells Jane he doesn't want to pay their bills anymore. He says he's tired of arguing with her, doesn't want her to have the baby, and wants to move out for a while and think things over.

"Under a bill recently passed by the Michigan House of Representatives, Bob could go to jail.

"House Bill 5882 creates the Coercive Abortion Prevention Act. Its purpose is to prohibit the putative father of a pregnant woman's child from coercing or intimidating the woman into terminating her pregnancy. While preventing violence or threats of violence against pregnant women is an admirable goal, the proposal goes way beyond this by interfering with constitutionally protected personal prerogatives.

"The proposal actually makes it a crime for a man to 'change or attempt to change an existing housing or cohabitation arrangement' with a pregnant significant other, to 'file or attempt to file for a divorce' from his pregnant wife or to 'withdraw or attempt to withdraw financial support' from a woman whom he has been supporting -- if it is determined that the man is doing these things to try to pressure the woman to terminate her pregnancy.

"This violates men's rights. The U.S. Constitution's protected liberty interests safeguard privacy in areas such as contraception, abortion, marriage, procreation, child rearing and sexual conduct between consenting adults.

"Do Michigan legislators believe these protections don't also cover the basic personal choices the proposal proscribes?

"The bill is also laden with unfair assumptions of male perfidy. There are many reasons why a man might be unhappy over his wife's or girlfriend's pregnancy, and consider ending his relationship with her. He may doubt that the child she is carrying is his. He may feel he was deceived into the pregnancy. She may lash out at him during her pregnancy-related mood swings, and he may take offense.

"A talented prosecuting attorney who may be looking for publicity could frame a man's decision as an attempt to coerce an abortion.

"The accused need not be convicted to suffer egregious harm -- the cost of criminal defense is often ruinous, and the emotional toll can be worse.

"The physical dangers from which House Bill 5882's supporters seek to protect pregnant women are real. It's debatable whether the bill's anti-violence provisions are good law, because the acts it specifies are already illegal.

"However, protecting women from violence is one thing -- punishing men for their peaceful, private conduct in their personal relationships is quite another."


Write a Letter to the Editor

To write a Letter to the Editor of the Detroit News regarding Bill assumes male guilt and opens door to unfair prosecutions (11/30/06), click here. If your letter is published, let me know and I will link to it from a future enewsletter. 


A 'Thank You' for an Opponent

Ironically, I first heard about CAPA from feminist blogger Barry Deutsch. Deutsch and other feminists, including the National Organization for Women, oppose the CAPA because they feel it will hinder women's abortion rights. NOW's views on the subject can be seen in Kary Moss' column A new tactic to intimidate women (5/8/06). Moss is the executive director of the ACLU of Michigan.

In writing about the bill Deutsch wrote something like "I wonder why the men's rights people aren't upset about this bill?" Thanks for the heads-up, Barry.
 
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Anti-Male Conservative Fires Back

In the counter to our column, Suanne Thompson, legislative liaison for Right to Life of Michigan, wrote:

"News stories report, 'Couple kidnaps pregnant daughter, drove to New York to force her to abort'; 'Mother forced pregnant 16-year-old daughter to drink turpentine to induce abortion'; and the latest, 'Arkansas man raped teen, forced her to have abortion.'

"These coerced abortions are a few of the most recent ones we know about. Forced abortions are at epidemic levels, yet are concealed in secrecy. This secret assault on women needs to be discouraged.

"Sixty-four percent of post-abortive women surveyed indicated they felt coerced to abort, having no choice but to comply with the wishes of others.

"Surprisingly, the No. 1 cause of death among pregnant women is homicide. Pregnant black women are seven times more likely to be murdered than pregnant white women. Often times the woman's refusal to abort precipitates the crime. Boyfriends, husbands, parents -- the very people who should protect the health and welfare of their pregnant spouse or daughter -- are the ones who selfishly demand the baby be eliminated.

"When women are threatened to abort, up to 80 percent feel guilt, regret, loss and depression afterward, especially if the coercion violated their conscience. They subsequently have shorter relationships, more divorces, live in poverty, repeat abortions, experience substance abuse and many more risk factors. There is a solution to this secret assault on women...

"After months of researching and evaluating numerous medical journal studies and thousands of personal testimonies, a package of bills has been written that makes it a crime to coerce a woman to abort her baby against her will.

"This legislation, known as the Coercive Abortion Prevention Act (CAPA), is sponsored by Michigan women legislators. It would give women the backing they need to stand up and say, 'You can't force me; it's against the law.'

"For those bullies who refuse to live up to this standard and continue to violate women, this law will identify perpetrators and bring them to justice. Abortion clinic personnel will screen every woman for coercion. If she identifies herself as being forced to abort, the clinic personnel will follow intervention protocols and develop a safety plan that may include a call to law enforcement or to a domestic violence shelter....

"This legislation is revolutionary first in the nation. This can also be a coming together of all factions who are interested in rescuing women from harm."

Read the full column here.

Several of Thompson's claims are questionable, to say the least. I would love to know more about the study where "Sixty-four percent of post-abortive women surveyed indicated they felt coerced to abort, having no choice but to comply with the wishes of others." Probably it was a self-selected survey where they took a group of women who feel they were victimized in relation to abortion, surveyed them, and then passed off the results as an indicator of how all women who have had an abortion feel.

The feminists do this all the time--for one example, see California NOW's Family Court Report 2002: Faulty Research, False Conclusions (Los Angeles Daily Journal, San Francisco Daily Journal, 7/11/02). In it I debunked a self-selected survey by the California branch of the National Organization for Women which they claimed showed that family courts were biased against women. California NOW didn't like my criticism, and complained about it in another report which they issued this October.

There are well over a million abortions a year, and have been for over three decades--do Thompson, Michigan Right to Life and their cothinkers really expect us to believe that in two-thirds of these cases the women only had the abortions because they "had no choice but to comply with the wishes" of the children's fathers? That's preposterous. The anti-male feminist left shifts all blame for gender-related problems onto men. Conservatives (or many of them) believe that abortion is wrong, so they try to shift the blame for abortion onto men.

Thompson claims "Surprisingly, the No. 1 cause of death among pregnant women is homicide." It's a "surprise" because it isn't true--see my next entry below for the details.

Thompson writes, "Pregnant black women are seven times more likely to be murdered than pregnant white women." Since black women are far more likely to be murdered in general than white women, it's hard to see what significance this statement is supposed to have. And women in general are vastly less likely to be murdered than men, the safest people of all being white women.

Thompson writes, "When women are threatened to abort, up to 80 percent feel guilt, regret, loss and depression afterward, especially if the coercion violated their conscience." Again, this is probably from a self-selected sample. And many women feel guilt or regrets over their abortions--I guess that's men's fault, too.

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Is It True That 'the No. 1 Cause of Death Among Pregnant Women is Homicide?'

One of the main pillars of Thompson's castle is her claim--commonly made by misguided feminists and the mainstream media--that "the No. 1 cause of death among pregnant women is homicide." This claim got a big boost from the Washington Post and its affiliated papers in December of 2004 when it published a highly-publicized series of articles which detailed an alleged epidemic of maternal homicide by male intimates.

There are two main points to be said about this claim. One, death among pregnant women is very rare, so even a relatively small number of homicides of pregnant women could make it the top cause of death. Two, as best as one can tell, murder is not the top cause of death among pregnant women, and probably is not even close. In my column New Report on Maternal Homicide Crisis: Myth-Making and Manbashing (Lexington Herald-Leader, 1/3/05) I discussed the issue in more detail:

"'Pregnant women murdered at an alarming rate.' 'Killings of new, expectant mothers mount.' 'Many new or expectant mothers die violent deaths.' 'Violence trails expectant mothers.' 'Pregnant mothers often die of murder.'

"These headlines top a highly-publicized new series of articles by Donna St. George of the Washington Post. The series, which appeared in many major newspapers and media outlets this week, details an alleged epidemic of maternal homicide by male intimates.

"The series powerfully depicts the tragedies of murdered expectant or new mothers. The mother-to-be killed the day her mother ordered the cake for her baby shower. The pregnant 14 year-old murdered by her 14 year-old ex-boyfriend. The bank manager killed because she wouldn't convert to her husband's religion before their twins were born. However, despite the emotion, alarm bells and blaring headlines, the series fails to build the case that maternal homicide is an epidemic, is on the rise, or is even a significant social problem.

"According to the Post's numbers, there are about 100 documented murders of pregnant women in the United States each year. Yet according to the Centers for Disease Control, nearly four million women give birth each year. One out of 40,000 is not an epidemic. The Post  speculates that the true number could be significantly higher but also notes that 30% of these killings are not related to childbearing, but instead involve drug dealing, robberies, errant gunfire, or other causes. And some pregnant women are killed by other women, as in the recent Missouri murder of Bobbie Jo Stinnett by a woman who cut her live baby from her womb.

"St. George and others point to a Journal of the American Medical Association article which states that in Maryland a 'pregnant or recently pregnant woman is more likely to be a victim of homicide than to die of any other cause.' This sounds alarming until one considers that there are an average of eight murders of pregnant women each year in Maryland--alongside 75,000 live births.

"St. George also cites a study by the Massachusetts Department of Public Health which allegedly showed murder to be the biggest cause of death for pregnant women and new mothers. When this study was released the Boston Globe summarized its findings as follows:

"Murder is the leading cause of death for Massachusetts mothers in the 21-month period from when they become pregnant until their babies reach their first birthday, according to a state review that shows domestic violence today is more dangerous than medical complications from childbirth."

"However, when public health specialist Ned Holstein of the Mount Sinai School of Medicine examined the report, he found that murder was well down the list of alleged causes of maternal death. According to the study's own data, the leading causes of death of pregnant or recently-pregnant women over a 10-year period were Medical conditions (152), Motor vehicle accidents (21), Domestic violence homicides (20), other homicides (10), and Miscellaneous (29). The epidemic of domestic violence-related homicides sweeping Massachusetts consists of an average of two deaths per year.

"'The risk of murder by an intimate is extremely small, not an epidemic,' says Holstein, a physician who also heads Fathers and Families of Massachusetts. 'Although every death is tragic, murder of pregnant women simply does not rank as a significant public health problem.'

"St. George's article series expresses commendable concern about battery of pregnant women but errs in claiming a link between domestic violence and pregnancy. According to longtime domestic violence researcher Richard J. Gelles, co-author of Behind Closed Doors, 'to be pregnant alone doesn't put a woman at risk.'

"'Women between the ages of 20 and 34 suffer the highest rate of domestic violence, and that is also the most likely age to be pregnant,' he says. 'Age is driving the risk, not pregnancy'...

"St. George uses anecdote and emotion in place of facts and research in order to find a mythical crisis of maternal homicide. It is another example of how legitimate concern for battered women often devolves into an alarmist and anti-male view of domestic violence and gender relations."

To learn more about the issue, also see my column Domestic Violence Series Substitutes Emotion for Facts (San Francisco Chronicle, 4/8/05).


Glenn Discusses the Coercive Abortion Prevention Act on the Nationally-Syndicated Lars Larson Show

Family law attorney Jeff Leving and I discussed our co-authored column Coercive Abortion Prevention Act Assumes Male Guilt, Opens Door to Unfair Prosecutions (Detroit News,11/30/06) on the nationally-syndicated Lars Larson Show on December 4.

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On the Subject of Violating Men's Rights to Allegedly 'Protect' Women...

In a recent column Kofi's Legacy Misfires Wendy McElroy of iFeminists discusses the United Nations new Secretary-General's Study on Violence Against Women (SVAW). The SVAW suggests removing "obstacles" to eliminating violence against women. McElroy writes:

"[One] identified obstacle is 'privacy rights' - that is, 'legal doctrines protecting the privacy of the home and family' (e.g. Fourth Amendment guarantees in the Constitution). Such doctrines are accused of 'justifying' the failure of the State and society to intervene when violence is committed against women in the family.'

"Next, 'obstacles' should be overcome by instituting new policies at 'federal, state, provincial and local levels, as well as...the judiciary, legislature and executive.'

"A specific example of a policy change: when prosecuting cases of violence against women 'rules of evidence and procedure, should be conducted in a gender-sensitive manner to ensure that women are not 're-victimized'.' This means criminal trials should provide 'in-camera proceedings where appropriate.' Specifically, courtroom procedures should 'protect the privacy of victims' by 'allowing evidence to be given by video link or restricting [public] access to courtrooms.'

"These changes alone would overhaul American courtrooms. The right of an accused to face and directly question an accuser is a fundamental principle of Western jurisprudence; the presence of transparency is an effective check on judicial corruption. Presenting evidence by video link to a closed courtroom would eliminate both."

As I've commented before, to the radical feminist mind, all that stuff about due process, the presumption of innocence, the right to face your accuser, etc., is just a patriarchal scam designed by men so they can rape and abuse women without consequence. The SVAW is another example of this thinking.

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US Has Way Too Many People in Prison

According to the Associated Press story 7M in U.S. jails, on probation or parole:

"A record 7 million people -- or one in every 32 American adults -- were behind bars, on probation or on parole by the end of last year, according to the Justice Department. Of those, 2.2 million were in prison or jail, an increase of 2.7 percent over the previous year, according to a report released Wednesday.

"More than 4.1 million people were on probation and 784,208 were on parole at the end of 2005. Prison releases are increasing, but admissions are increasing more."

Of course, even though this tragedy disproportionately affects men--particularly men of color--the author can't resist explaining why the problems is so bad for women, who make up all of 7% of the prison population:

"Men still far outnumber women in prisons and jails, but the female population is growing faster. Over the past year, the female population in state or federal prison increased 2.6 percent while the number of male inmates rose 1.9 percent. By year's end, 7 percent of all inmates were women. The gender figures do not include inmates in local jails.

"'Today's figures fail to capture incarceration's impact on the thousands of children left behind by mothers in prison,' Marc Mauer, the executive director of the Sentencing Project, a Washington-based group supporting criminal justice reform, said in a statement. 'Misguided policies that create harsher sentences for nonviolent drug offenses are disproportionately responsible for the increasing rates of women in prisons and jails.'

"From 1995 to 2003, inmates in federal prison for drug offenses have accounted for 49 percent of total prison population growth."

I sympathize with women incarcerated for nonviolent drug offenses, of course, but I see no reason to separate their situations from those of all of the (many more) men who are incarcerated for the same reasons.
 

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This Incredible Story Speaks Volumes About the Way Our Society Views Fathers

From the Detroit News article Dad's goodbye stokes fears (11/29/06):

"A five-county police lookout for a would-be child abductor ended Tuesday morning with a nervous phone call and the realization the suspect was nothing more than a father waving to his own daughter.

"In an incident police acknowledge stoked fears about pedophiles, the manhunt began when another 9-year-old at a playground at Lafayette Elementary School said a man motioned to her about 11:15 a.m. Monday, then fled in his vehicle as she ran to tell teachers.

"Police said the man never noticed the other girl and her reaction, but realized the mix-up after watching reports about the incident on TV.

"In reality, he was simply passing by, saw his child and stepped out of his pickup to motion hello.

"'I think we are just in a society of fear right now. It's unfortunate, but I don't know if we want to be less cautious either,' said Lincoln Park Lt. Ron Szalay.

"Police issued a bulletin Monday to law enforcement agencies in Wayne, Macomb, Oakland, Washtenaw and Monroe counties.

"They were looking for a man in his 40s, driving a blue pickup truck.

"By 3 p.m., police received a report from Sterling Heights about a truck and driver that fit the description.

"However, after getting a call from the school's principal, Szalay called off the search.

"'We had a fair description and extra cars patrolling around the school (Tuesday morning) so we probably would have stopped him if he had come to drop off his kid,' Szalay said.

"Police aren't releasing the man's name, but Lafayette Elementary Principal Craig Stanczyk said he and his family are 'great folks.'

"He was happy the man's wife called him Tuesday morning to clear up the misunderstanding.

"'She said, 'My husband is very nervous,' Stanczyk said.

"'Nobody wants to be falsely accused.'

"But, Stanczyk said the girl who made the report did everything she was taught.

"'It proves that we have a plan and it works,' Stanczyk said.

"'In this situation, it is better to be safe than sorry.'"

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Michigan NOW Declares 'Action Alert' Against Shared Parenting Bill

Michigan shared parenting advocates and the Michigan chapter of the National Organization for Women are squaring off over HB 5267, a Michigan shared parenting bill which will be heard by the House Families and Children Services Committee on December 6. Last week NOW issued an "Action Alert" against the bill. Michigan shared parenting groups, including Dads of Michigan, the American Coalition for Fathers & Children's Michigan affiliate, the Family Rights Coalition of Michigan, and others, are rallying support for the bill.

The contact information for the members of the House Families and Children Services Committee who will be deciding on HB 5267 next week are below--I suggest you call and write them. While letters from Michigan residents are best, letters from other states are also helpful.
 

House F&C Committee District Position Phone (517) Fax (517) E-mail
Rep. John Stahl (Chair) R-North Branch Supports 373-1800 373-9981 Email
Rep. Tom Pearce (Vice Chair) R-Rockford Supports 373-0218 373-5697 Email
Rep. Jack Hoogendyk* R-Kalamazoo Supports 373-1774 373-8872 Email
Rep. Fulton Sheen* R-Plainwell Supports 373-0836 373-8728 Email
Rep. Barb Vander Veen* R-Allendale Undecided 373-0838 373-9830 Email
Rep. Brenda Clack (Vice Chair) D-Flint Undecided 373-8808 373-5997 Email
Rep. Lamar Lemmons, Jr. D-Detroit Supports 373-0106 373-7271 Email
Rep. Gino Polidori D-Dearborn Undecided 373-0847 373-7538 Email
Rep. Dudley Spade D-Tipton Undecided 373-1706 373-5777 Email
           
House Leadership          
Rep. Craig DeRoche, Speaker R-Novi   373-0827 373-5873 Email
Rep. Chris Ward, Floor Leader* R-Brighton   373-1784 373-8957 Email
Rep. Dianne Byrum, Dem Leader D-Onondaga   373-0587 373-9430 Email
           
*Sponsor of HB 5267          


The Case for HB 5267

Michigan NOW makes its case against shared parenting and HB 5267 here. I laid out the case in favor of HB 5267 and discussed many of NOW's criticisms in my co-authored column HB 5267 Will Help Michigan's Children of Divorce (Lansing State Journal, 5/28/06). Mike McCormick, Executive Director of the American Coalition for Fathers & Children, and I wrote:

"HB 5267 is primarily sponsored by Rep. Leslie Mortimer (R-Horton), who has been joined by 10 other legislators. When parents cannot agree on custody arrangements, the bill instructs courts to order joint custody unless there is clear and convincing evidence that one of the parents is unfit, unwilling, or unable to care for his or her child. A mediator will then help the parents draft a shared parenting plan based on each parent having substantially equal time with their children. The principle behind the bill is difficult to dispute--as long as both parents are fit and there are no extenuating circumstances, they should both share in parenting their children... 

"NOW claims that HB 5267 'places the interests of parents over the child's interests.' Yet when researchers have examined children of divorce, and studied and queried adult children of divorce, they've found that most prefer joint custody and shared parenting.

"For example, a study by psychologist Joan Kelly, published in the Family and Conciliation Courts Review, found that children of divorce 'express higher levels of satisfaction with joint physical custody than with sole custody arrangements,' and cite the 'benefit of remaining close to both parents' as an important factor.

"When Arizona State University psychology professor William Fabricius conducted a study of college students who had experienced their parents' divorces while they were children, he found that over two-thirds believed that 'living equal amounts of time with each parent is the best arrangement for children.' His findings were published in Family Relations in 2003.

"Under current law, judges decide custody cases based on the 12 factors delineated in Michigan's Best Interest of the Child Test. Both the Michigan Bar and Michigan NOW assure us that this system is effective and should not be changed. However, the 12 factors fail to place sufficient emphasis on protecting children's relationships with both parents. According to the Michigan Family Independence Agency, the most common parenting time schedule in Michigan allows children only 15% physical time with their noncustodial parents.

"Moreover, the custody decisions based on the factors are often subjective and arbitrary. Under HB 5267 a court cannot deny requests for joint custody without stating its reasons on the record.

"Michigan NOW also asserts that HB 5267 will 'further impoverish children of separated or divorced parents' because in Michigan, as in most states, the amount of physical time divorced parents spend with their children and the concomitant expenses are calculated into the child support obligation. These fears are also unwarranted.

"Research demonstrates that joint custody leads to higher rates of child support compliance. This isn't surprising, since parents who are permitted little role in their children's lives have less motivation to make sacrifices for them. Also, under the current system noncustodial parents are often forced to wage expensive court battles in order to protect their time and relationships with their children. These parents end up supporting lawyers instead of kids.

"While Michigan NOW is correct that there are fathers who put their pocketbooks above their children's best interests, they ignore the obvious converse. If a dad may seek 40 or 50% physical time with his children simply to lower his child support obligation, doesn't it also hold that a mother may seek 85% physical time in order to increase it?

"Both Domestic Violence Escape and NOW claim that the bill will put abused women in harm's way. According to DOVE, HB 5267 'sends a clear message to battered women and children that the 'rights' of a batterer take precedence over their safety and wellbeing.' Yet under HB 5267 only fit parents are eligible for joint custody--battered mothers should and would receive sole custody.

"Unfortunately, NOW, DOVE and other misguided women's advocates seem capable of recognizing only two types of divorces--ones where both spouses agree on a custody arrangement, and divorces involving domestic violence. However, the overwhelming majority of breakups fit neither profile. Instead, decent, fit parents often cannot agree on custody. In such cases, HB 5267 will ensure that children won't see one of the two people they love the most pushed to the margins of their lives."


More on HB 5267

Dr. Michael T. Ross of the Family Rights Coalition of Michigan has some interesting and informative links on HB 5267, including much opposition commentary, below:

HB 5267 as Introduced
HB 5267 Legislative Analysis
Michigan State Bar Public Policy Resource Center (CapWiz)
Family Law Section Article on HB5267 (page 3)
Family Law Section Position on HB5267
Referee Association Article on HB5267
Michigan National Organization for Women
Hanna's Blog: Response to Comments that a Presumption of Joint Custody is Appropriate
Hanna's Blog: Custody Determinations Should Depend Upon the Particular Facts of a Case, Not a Presumption
Proposed Joint Custody Legislation HB 5267 | Make Your Voice Heard in Lansing
Michigan Poverty Law Program - Rebecca Shiemke
 

Steven Carlson's How to Win Child Custody
Are you contemplating divorce or separation but are unsure about how child custody will be determined or what you can expect from attorneys and the family court system? Knowing these things can help you win custody. Steven Carlson is known nationally as The Custody Coach, and has helped thousands of parents with child custody and custody evaluation. He is the author of "How to Win Child Custody" and the founder of Child Custody Coach in Orange County, California. Don't get caught unprepared, download your copy of "How to Win Child Custody" today.

Help for Boston Dads
Boston family law attorney Nick Palermo is a shared custody advocate who believes that divorced dads are parents, not visitors. The Law Offices of Nicholas Palermo is a dedicated and committed trial law firm which has worked to make shared custody for all fit parents the law of the land. LAW OFFICES OF NICHOLAS PALERMO

Expose False Allegations with Technology
Don't let the anti-male bias in criminal law victimize you. If you could be falsely accused by an angry woman, be prepared! Use technology to expose the real aggressor. DontMakeHerMad.com

New Jersey Divorce and Family Law
New Jersey family law attorney David Perry Davis, Esq. can help you through your divorce. In Pasqua v. Council (2006) Davis successfully challenged New Jersey's unconstitutional practice of failing to appoint attorneys for indigent child support obligors at enforcement hearings where they face incarceration. As a result of this suit, trial courts must apply the same standard used when a defendant requests a public defender in a criminal matter. www.dpdlaw.com

Without Honor
Has the family court system failed you? Without Honor is the true expose of one man's journey in the Rancho Cucamonga, California Family Law court system. It chronicles the destruction of a man's life at the hands of unethical attorneys and judges, who carry out their operations under the guise of equitable, established law and the facade of respectability. Order Without Honor by clicking here.


Wisdom of Our Fathers

As I mentioned after my co-authored column America's Father Hunger (World Net Daily, 10/13/06) came out, a new feature on my enewsletter for the near future is an excerpt from Wisdom of Our Fathers. This week's excerpt is "The Tag" from H. John Brandel of Wingate, NC, about his father John J. Brandel (1916-1991), who served in World War II.

"A few weeks after Dad was buried, I was going through his personal effects. I opened his wallet, where I found a dollar and a couple of pictures of his four granddaughters. I pulled out his driver's license, and out fell a tag like the ones you get on your Christmas gifts. I looked at it closely, and on the back, written in my mother's hand, was a note that said, He tried to write his name, and he wanted me to ask you, 'When are you coming home, Daddy?'

"This man, whom I used to think I could never satisfy, had carried around, for forty-seven years, a note from his wife and two-year-old son from Christmas 1944. I learned from this that a father's love is an enduring thing. Sometimes it's hard for children to see, and sometimes it's hard for father's to show, but that love is always there."    

Help for Maryland Fathers
Family law attorney Dawn Elaine Bowie works to protect parents' relationships with their children and reduce post-divorce conflict. She practices in Montgomery, Anne Arundel and Prince George's Counties. Contact her at attorneydawn@marylandfamilylawfirm.com or go to www.marylandfamilylawfirm.com.

Parenting Plan Calendar Software
Shared Ground (R) is an easy-to-use custody calendar software program designed for divorced families to track visitation schedules. Includes a built-in percentage calculator, schedule templates, free training and excellent customer assistance. Parents, attorneys, arbitrators and mediators can generate equitable parenting plans, which is especially useful for parents seeking fair division of their children's time. FREE TRIAL SOFTWARE AVAILABLE by clicking here.

How Does Sex Discrimination Affect Men and Boys?
The National Coalition of Free Men Los Angeles is a non-profit educational & civil rights organization that looks at the ways sex discrimination affects men and boys. NCFM-LA helps provide men a unified voice on important political and social issues. www.NCFMLA.org 


PBS Campaign Aftermath: Corporation for Public Broadcasting Ombudsman Praises PBS for 'Making Good on Its Promise' to Air Balanced Program

In October 2005, PBS aired the film Breaking the Silence: Children's Stories on many of its affiliates. The film portrayed fathers as batterers and child molesters who use family court machinations to wrest children away from their mothers. The film was extremely one-sided, and presented a harmful and inaccurate view of divorce and child custody cases. Moreover, the film portrayed one mother as a heroic, victimized mom, when records which we made public show that she had abused children under her care, and had lost custody for that reason.

I joined with Fathers and Families, the American Coalition for Fathers & Children, and others in a campaign to force PBS to "provide fatherhood and shared parenting advocates a meaningful opportunity to present our side of the issues." Over 10,000 of you wrote or called PBS, and both PBS's ombudsman and the Corporation for Public Broadcasting's ombudsman echoed our central criticisms about the film.

In December, PBS notified us that they would "commission an hour-long documentary" for the purpose of further examining the "complex and important issues" raised in the film and by our campaign. They promised the "hour-long treatment of the subject will allow ample opportunity" for those of differing views to "have their perspectives shared, challenged and debated."

Kids & Divorce: For Better or Worse, the film they commissioned in response to our campaign, aired in over 50 markets in September. To PBS's credit, they followed through on the commitment they made last December to produce a balanced film. Moreover, PBS partially adopted the approach we suggested for the film. Earlier this year Fathers and Families wrote to Dave Iverson, the film's producer and host, and suggested that he make shared parenting the central theme of the new PBS film. We are pleased to see that Iverson took the suggestion seriously--much of Kids & Divorce concerns shared parenting.

The film made two overriding points. Much of the mainstream media engages in divorce happy talk, particularly left-leaning institutions, of which PBS is one. However, from Kids & Divorce's opening moments the film powerfully depicts the way children suffer in divorce. Also, throughout the film it was clear that children want and need both parents, that they are very aggrieved when their parents don't get along, and that two-parent involvement is important after divorce.

This week Ken A. Bode, the Ombudsman for the Corporation for Public Broadcasting, issued PBS Follows Through On Commitment to Air Balanced Program, his report on the Breaking the Silence controversy. Bode writes:

"[PBS Follows Through On Commitment to Air Balanced Program] was the headline on the column written by commentator and talk show host Glenn Sacks. Mr. Sacks was a leader in denouncing the PBS broadcast, Breaking the Silence: Children's Stories broadcast systemwide in October 2005. The program was a documentary about the treatment of abused children in divorce courts offered by Connecticut Public Television and underwritten by the Mary Kay Ash Foundation.

"'The film was extremely one-sided, and presented a harmful and inaccurate view of divorce and child custody cases,' says Mr. Sacks. He helped mobilize groups representing fathers to produce thousands of letters and calls to PBS along with many postings on the CPB Ombudsman's website.

"In my initial review of the program, I said the following: 'My own conclusion is that there is no hint of balance in Breaking the Silence. The father's point of view is ignored as are new strategies for lessening the damage to children in custody battles.' Michael Getler, the ombudsman for PBS, shared my conclusions that the programs lacked fairness and balance.

"At PBS the program was placed under official review, and last December it was announced that PBS would commission an hour-long documentary for the purpose of further examining the complex and important issues raised in Breaking the Silence. Twin Cities Public Television was tapped to produce the second film, and they engaged experienced PBS broadcaster David Iverson as producer, writer and host. Jerry Richmond, head of programming for Twin Cities says that PBS did not prescribe a point of view. 'PBS only told us to do another program on the subject. They did not say to do it in response to Breaking the Silence.'

"The resulting program, Kids & Divorce: For Better or Worse, reflects the experience and skills of David Iverson, and also showcases his ability to produce a fair and objective treatment of the problems of child custody cases, a part of the law where the issues have become enmeshed in gender politics. Iverson's approach was simply to say, 'How can we improve the odds of kids doing well in divorce? The central question is what can make things better for kids? We'll try to figure it out.'

"All in all the hour-long production chugs along in a steady, deliberate manner, as if in a permanent second gear. Panels of psychological, legal and custody experts are assembled with Mr. Iverson leading a series of discussions, using his low-key, Mr. Rogers manner to good advantage.

"Keeping to the central question of what best serves the kids, Iverson examines the legal system -- Does it make it better or worse? -- along with various shared custody arrangements. If the film has a point of view it is that children want and need both parents and that two-parent involvement after a divorce is important. An interesting point is that the notion of joint custody is becoming a political issue at the state level. The film briefly examines moves toward shared parenting laws in Massachusetts and Iowa.

"There were a few criticisms of Kids & Divorce, but most respondents agreed with Mr. Sacks. PBS spent a considerable amount of money on the film and made an honest and effective effort to be balanced. As Sacks put it, 'Last fall on PBS dads were portrayed as evil, scheming abusers. This week dads were portrayed as an important and valued part of their children's lives.'

"What lessons are to be learned from this experience with Breaking the Silence and Kids & Divorce? Perhaps the overriding one is that before accepting programming for the PBS schedule, someone needs to make a more thorough check on the motives of sponsors. Breaking the Silence was underwritten by a grant from the Mary Kay Ash Foundation, an organization devoted to the laudable goal of stopping violence against women, especially abusive relationships. The mission of the organization seemingly drove the original production in the direction of concluding that family courts are routinely awarding child custody to abusive fathers.

"I am not suggesting that rigid guidelines be adopted which preclude advocacy organizations or foundations from funding public affairs programming on PBS or NPR. But somewhere there must be a responsibility to check the editorial thrust of the production against the mission of the sponsors and to assure that the standards of fairness and balance are not sacrificed to political agendas.

"Jerry Richmond of Twin Cities Public TV checked the carriage reports for Breaking the Silence and Kids & Divorce and found them nearly equal at 77 and 78 percent. That's more good news. Kudos to PBS for making good on its promise and for trusting a solid production team to do the job with no strings attached."

I gave my full critique of Breaking the Silence here, and Dr. Ned Holstein of Fathers and Families gave his here. As I pointed out, the show, while good, does have its weaknesses. As far as entertainment goes, Bode's description of it "chugging along in a steady, deliberate manner, as if in a permanent second gear" is apt. On a brighter note, Bode's comment that "If the film has a point of view it is that children want and need both parents and that two-parent involvement after a divorce is important" is also appropriate. 

It was nice to see Bode note that as far as markets and air time is concerned, the balanced Kids & Divorce got as much--in fact a tiny bit more--than Breaking the Silence did. Thanks again to Fathers and Families, the American Coalition for Fathers & Children, and the many thousands of you who participated in our campaign.

Lisa Scott Launches RealFamilyLaw.com
Shared Parenting Advocate/Family Law Attorney Lisa Scott has launched www.RealFamilyLaw.com to expose the truth about what is happening in our family law system. Lisa, the all-time leader in appearances on His Side with Glenn Sacks, says that she was "tired of having her stuff rejected by elitist bar publications and politically-correct newspapers" and decided to start her own website. www.RealFamilyLaw.com

Help for Michigan Dads
Michigan family law attorney Mindy L. Hitchcock has experience fighting for noncustodial parents against Michigan's abusive FOC. Her holistic approach to divorce gets results for her clients while avoiding the scorched earth approach to law that leaves families emotionally and financially devastated. www.Lady4Justice.com

Save Money and Get Better Gas Mileage
Do you want to save money and get better gas mileage? Get more performance from your vehicle? Make your engine last longer? MPG-CAPS is a 100% organic engine conditioner that simultaneously improves fuel economy and power by creating a micro-thin coating on the combustion chamber in your engine allowing your fuel to burn more efficiently. MPG-CAPS are perfect for gasoline, diesel, biodiesel and gasoline-ethanol powered engines. To learn more, click here or contact FFI Independent Representative Ted Wacholtz here. FFI products come with a 100% money back guarantee.

Woman Spends Thanksgiving On Billboard

Shared Parenting activist Teri Stoddard writes about a great protest:

"Shelly Barreras says sometimes you have to do whatever it takes, in a peaceful way, to get results, especially when you're dealing with government.

"New Mexico Governor Richardson has apparently reneged on a promise to help the Barreras family recover $15,000 collected by the state as child support from Steve Barreras, for a child that never existed.

"At half-past four Thursday morning Barreras climbed a ladder to her perch above I-40 to hang a large banner. Emergency vehicles and crews from three television stations arrived and the roads were closed.

"VIDEO: Barreras planned on spending four days atop the billboard at I-40 and University in Albuquerque, until Clear Channel Outdoor - Global Outdoor Advertising representatives offered a venue for her issues in exchange for her descent. She agreed to come down after 10 hours and 30 minutes, and was not arrested.

"'I didn't just do this for my family,' Barreras explained, 'I did it for all the families in this country who are suffering with family law and child support issues. The whole system needs to be demolished and rebuilt.'

"'I thought of John Murtari in New York, who's endured over 100 days without solid food for parents' rights. His non-violent peaceful protest inspired me to do whatever I could to bring attention to the issue of family law reform,' Barreras said, 'We definitely need immediate Congressional Hearings.'"

Help for Seattle Fathers
The Law Offices of O. Yale Lewis III is a one-person law firm that focuses on customer care. Mr. Lewis can help you identify and focus on the outcome that you want and implement the steps necessary to get there. www.yalelewislaw.com.

Help for California Divorced Dads
The Divorced Fathers Network helps dads in Los Angeles, the Bay Area and Santa Cruz. Local chapters sponsor free weekly co-parenting classes, individual mentoring for fathers and much more. www.divorcedfathers.com.

The Secrets of Happily Married Men
How can a man achieve a long and happy marriage? If you've been checking out advice columns or seeing a therapist, you may have been looking in the wrong place. Despite all the advances in brain technology, and all of that we have learned about developmental psychology--men and women are given the same advice about solving problems. But when we ask men what works for them, we hear a different story. www.SecretsofMarriedMen.com


The Cost of Divorce to Businesses

I've pointed out on numerous occasions the problems faced by divorced and divorcing military parents--to learn more, see my co-authored column Protect Deployed Parents' Rights (Tucson Citizen, 11/9/06, Trenton Times, 11/11/06, Macon Telegraph, 11/11/06). The military has recognized the way divorce is hurting its personnel, and has taken some steps to try to curb divorce within its ranks.

Divorce is also very costly to businesses. I believe that eventually the business community will be compelled to fully recognize this, and join in efforts to reduce the divorce rate and to address the problems within the family law system which help make divorce so painful and devastating. Dr. John Curtis has a business background and is also a former marriage counselor, and he has some interesting observations on this issue in his book The Business of Love. Below are some quotes Curtis has collected from experts about the cost of divorce to businesses:

"Have you looked at your employee assistance program statistics lately? You would suddenly find the number of people who sought assistance in areas that are related to marriage. Your employee costs are higher today because of the difficulty your people are having in their marriages." -- Former Lieutenant Governor John Mutz of Indiana (1981-1989), President of PSI Energy (1993-1999)

"A family or career does not happen in a vacuum. It's all interwoven. It's interrelated...The divorce rate has an impact on the bottom line of every business because divorce is not an easy thing and whenever a person is undergoing divorce, that affects their ability to focus and concentrate in their business...Personal problems inevitably distract workers and sap them of energy." -- Dr. Joy Reed Belt - Owner, Oklahoma City Human Resources Consulting Firm

"...good marriages may buffer couples against the stress of demanding jobs in which the worker has little control....You may not be able to get away from the job stress, but a good marriage soothes people, minimizing bad effects from the job." -- American Psychosomatic Society - Study by psychologists Janice Kiecolt-Glaser and Ronald Glaser of Ohio State University College of Medicine, Vancouver, B.C.

"You can't expect people to do well in their business if they've got problems at home...Happy homes means more productive employees."-- S. Truett Cathy, Founder of Chick-fil-A which spends millions annually on programs to help couples enrich their relationships.

"Divorce disrupts the workplace more than drugs or alcohol." -- The College of Family Life Extension

I've discussed Curtis' work on marriage before--see Marriages Breaking up over Money.

Experience the Book that Dares to Scream the Inner Thoughts of Men
Drawing upon encounters with both foreign and domestic women, American writer Thomas Ellis offers up The Rantings of a Single Male: Losing Patience with Feminism, Political Correctness... and Basically Everything--a collection of incredible but true stories, satire, and social commentary. Running the gamut from hilarious to tragic, these rants employ dark humor to illuminate the many absurdities of our gender culture. Ellis is unapologetic and unrestrained in his handling of women's history, women's spirituality, gender norming, implants, affirmative action, rape hysteria, pornography, homophobia, and bad dates. Contains adult situations and language. Now in its third printing. On sale through the end of 2006 for $9.95 + shipping from Amazon via direct purchase.

The LaMusga Company
The LaMusga Company provides customized solutions to assist individuals and business owners in reaching their financial goals. The LaMusga Company is committed to helping you accomplish your long-term financial objectives. LaMusgaCo.com


Tawny Kitaen in Trouble Again

Some of you may recall the case of former pitcher Chuck Finley, who was a victim of domestic violence perpetrated by his then-wife, actress Tawny Kitaen.

Kitaen was arrested in April of 2002 for attacking Finley as he was driving the couple home. Police officers reported seeing abrasions and scrapes on Finley's body after Kitaen had allegedly kicked Finley repeatedly with her high-heeled shoes, grabbed his ear and twisted it, and put her foot on top of his, forcing the accelerator to the floor. After Kitaen's arrest, Finley was granted temporary custody of their two daughters, then ages nine and three.    

Pam Sheek, a 51 year-old nanny who has cared for the Finley children for six years, made a sworn declaration shortly afterward stating that Kitaen has a severe prescription drug addiction and that her erratic and abusive behavior has often put the children at risk. She described an incident in March, 2002 when Kitaen turned on the gas in the gas fireplace log without lighting it and then called the two children to come into bed with her to go to sleep. Sheek, suspicious, entered the room and, smelling the gas, turned off the fireplace, probably saving the lives of both Kitaen and her children.

In September of 2003 Kitaen went on the Howard Stern Show and denied everything, claiming that she was the victim of abuse, and that she was getting railroaded. I criticized her for this on His Side with Glenn Sacks, and sure enough I got a letter from Kitaen the next week, telling me that I was wrong, irresponsible, unfair to her, etc.

A little while afterwards I was amazed but not surprised to see that Inside Edition did an interview exclusive with Kitaen shortly after the Stern Show, and in it Kitaen admitted that she had attacked Finley. Kitaen's letter of apology to me must have gotten lost in the mail.

Now Kitaen is back in trouble again. According to the E! Online article Tawny Kitaen's Cocaine Rap:

"Actress Tawny Kitaen, who was best known for a handful of '80s-era roles before supposedly clocking hubby Chuck Finley with her high-heeled shoes, was rung up Tuesday on a felony drug charge. 

"Prosecutors said that the Bachelor Party bride-to-be is facing one count of possessing a controlled substance after police found 15 grams of cocaine in her apartment. 

"According to Jim Amormino of the Orange County Sheriff's Department, deputies showed up at Kitaen's San Juan Capistrano apartment to perform a 'welfare check' on her and her two daughters with Finley, Wynter and Raine. 

"Police said that Kitaen was not under the influence of any drugs or alcohol at the time but that the children, ages 8 and 13, were home when officers arrived and found the cocaine.  

"Kitaen, 45, who's scheduled to be arraigned Dec. 18, is facing up to three years in prison if convicted. But, she can avoid hard time if she qualifies for a drug diversion program and enters rehab, O.C. District Attorney's Office spokeswoman Susan Schroeder said. 

"Whitesnake's favorite hood ornament pleaded guilty to attacking Finley, then a pitcher for the Cleveland Indians, in 2002 in exchange for the court's dismissal of two misdemeanor spousal abuse charges. Kitaen agreed to attend anger management and conflict resolution counseling and donate $500 to a battered-women's shelter. 

"The case wasn't closed until October 2003, however, when Kitaen issued a written apology for saying in an interview on The Howard Stern Show that she had been forced into a guilty plea. The onetime music video muse also denied having a drug problem, which Finley had alleged in court documents and Kitaen later admitted, saying she had developed an addiction to prescription meds for depression and migraines. 

"Finley filed for divorce on Apr. 4, three days after he accused Kitaen of kicking him with her stiletto boots and viciously twisting his ear while the couple were driving to their home in Newport Beach..."

It's against my nature to ever sympathize with false accusers, and I doubt I'll ever be counted among Kitaen's supporters. Nevertheless, I certainly don't think she should go to jail for three years for possessing cocaine. Similarly, I don't believe we should be locking up hundreds of thousands of people--mostly minority males--for drug use, either.

Nobody despises drug abuse more than I, but I also believe that while our society insists on treating drug abuse as a criminal justice problem, it is in reality a public health problem. Many of these celebrity drug cases are a good example. Kitaen has screwed up her life with her drug addictions, yet she continues, and the criminal justice system's typical reaction--"she's broken the law, let's put her in jail" doesn't begin to address her real problem.

The Steve Howe and Daryl Strawberry cases are other examples. Both were immensely talented athletes who damaged/destroyed their careers because of their addictions. Logically, all three would do anything to get off of the stuff. I have to believe that the reason is not that they don't want to, but that they can't.

I suppose one could argue that locking them up separates them from their drugs, but I doubt this is true--there are plenty of drugs in prison. One time I heard a radio interview with an ex-convict who said that he used to sneak under the guard tower at his prison, meet his dealer and do his drugs. I remember thinking "here's a guy who's locked up in prison, surrounded by huge cement walls and barbed wire, standing underneath a