Group of Domestic Violence Dissidents/Authorities
Sponsors Historic Conference
Background: The domestic violence establishment
is not telling us the full truth about domestic
violence, and many destructive family law and criminal
law policies have been based on misinformation.
Research clearly establishes that women are frequently
the aggressors in domestic combat, often employing
the element of surprise and weapons to compensate
for men's strength. Yet arrest and prosecution policies
are stacked against men, as is the public dialogue
on this important issue. Perhaps worst of all, misguided
women's groups' distortion of the domestic violence
issue has been the leading impediment to passing
shared parenting legislation.
Last year dozens of leading
authorities in the domestic violence field formed
the National Family
Violence Legislative Resource Center (NFVLRC)
to change the domestic violence system. The
NFVLRC advocates for non-discriminatory and
evidence-based policies and seeks to correct the
many damaging laws and policies which have been
based on misleading claims.
NFVLRC co-founder
John Hamel, LCSW, a court-certified
batterer treatment provider and author of the book
Gender-Inclusive Treatment of Intimate Partner
Abuse, explains:
"The founding members
of NFVLRC have recognized for some time that current
policies are politically driven rather being based
on scientifically sound information, and are seeking
to change them. As a result of flawed policies,
many children are being denied the same range of
services simply because of their victimized parent's
gender. Current policies have in many instances
also resulted in a loss of civil liberties, and
research indicates that they have sometimes resulted
in increased danger to victims...NFVLRC believes
that unless domestic and family violence policies
are reformed, victims, children and future generations
will continue to suffer from this social problem."
Last year over 50 of these authorities signed
a letter urging the California legislature to stop
the state's policy of excluding male victims and
their children from domestic violence services.
The
California Alliance for Families and Children
is sponsoring an historic, one-of-a-kind conference--"From
Ideology to Inclusion: Evidence-Based Policy and
Intervention in Domestic Violence." The conference
will be held Friday/Saturday, February 15-16, 2008
in Sacramento, California, and will feature speakers
from the
NFVLRC.
There will be 5 Plenary Sessions and 15 Breakout
Sessions. Topics include:
Current Policy Issues * Research Trends * Male and
Female Victims* DV in the LGBT Community * DV in
Ethnic Minority Groups * Restraining Orders* Female
Perpetrators * DV and Child Abuse * DV and Child
Custody * Co-ed Shelters * Gender-Inclusive and
Research-Based Interventions * DV and Adolescents
* Family Treatment * Working with Victimized Children
Many of the leading authorities
in the domestic violence field will be speaking
at the conference. These include: Erin Pizzey, founder
of one of the world's first battered women's shelters
in 1971; author and psychologist Don Dutton, who
served as a domestic violence expert on the prosecution
team in the OJ Simpson trial; Linda Mills, PhD,
LCSW, JD, New York University; Murray Straus, PhD,
of the University of New Hampshire; clinical psychologist
Jennifer Langhinrichsen-Rohling of the University
of South Alabama; Philip Cook, author of Abused
Men: The Hidden Side of Domestic Violence;
Janet Johnston, PhD; forensic psychologist Dr. Tonia
Nicholls; Marlene Moretti, PhD, coauthor of the
book, Girls and Aggression: Contributing
Factors and Intervention Principles; Miriam
Ehrensaft Ph.D, of the Division of Child & Adolescent
Psychiatry, at Columbia University; Nicola Graham-Kevan,
BSc, PhD, senior lecturer in psychology at the University
of Central Lancashire [UK]; and numerous others.
The conference will be held at the Clarion Hotel
Mansion Inn in Sacramento, CA, and discounted hotel
rates are still available. For the conference schedule
and to register, visit
www.NFVLRC.org
and see the bottom of the home page.
Mike Robinson of the CAFC says:
"We already have had a great response in registration,
with several county probation departments registering,
one state's Supreme Court staff and justices, family
court and private mediation groups, custody evaluators,
attorneys, and many more."
To donate to help support the Conference,
click
here.
To learn more about the National Family Violence
Legislative Resource Center, visit their website
at
www.nfvlrc.org. To contact them, write to John
Hamel by clicking
here.
To discuss this issue on my blog, click
here.
[Note: If you or someone you love is being abused,
the Domestic Abuse Helpline
for Men and Women provides crisis intervention
and support services to victims of domestic violence
and their families.]
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The American Coalition for
Fathers and Children
The American Coalition for
Fathers and Children is
dedicated to creating a
family law system which
promotes equal rights for
all parties affected by
divorce. Contact the ACFC
at 1-800-978-3237 or visit
them on the web at
www.acfc.org. |
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Another Cadillac 'Women's Revenge Against Men' Ad
 I
don't see anything particularly bad about this Cadillac
commercial--it certainly is much, much tamer than
the "I love humiliating my male employees" Cadillac
commercial that I wrote about a few months ago in
Cadillac
Thinks Humiliating Men Is Great Revenge--and
Adweek Agrees. Still, the commercial is
a little irritating.
Perhaps it's because it is another example of
the relentless modern "woman as bad winner" attitude.
Feminists would say that my objection is because
I don't like to see a woman be successful, but that's
hardly the case. My wife is highly educated and
successful, and I have done much to help her achieve.
The reality is that nobody likes a bad winner. Nobody
likes somebody who rubs their success in other people's
faces.
In the modern world, men are supposed to support
women's career progress and achievements, as well
as affirmative action and other measures designed
to bolster women's careers. There is certainly a
logic to this, since women's child-bearing/rearing
role does hamper their careers.
However, it seems that with some women, the moment
they are successful they can't wait to turn around
and rub it in the nearest man's face. Like in this
commercial. And if he doesn't like it, he's "sexist."
This isn't nice or fair to men, and I can't imagine
that it is good for women's progress either. This
Cadillac commercial is one small example among many.
To watch the commercial, click
here. To learn more about Cadillac's anti-male
commercials and the controversy over them, click
here.
To discuss this issue on my blog, click
here.
Thanks to Stan, a reader, for sending it to me.
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A Legal Advocate for Fathers
in Los Angeles & Ventura
Counties
The Law Offices of Adam
Michael Sacks, Esq., handles
cases of all sizes with
compassion, understanding,
and a commitment to helping
fathers protect themselves
in a divorce. Don't assume
anything and don't sign
anything--call Adam Sacks,
Esq. at 1-800-340-7320,
or write him at
adam@adamlawyer.com.
www.adamlawyer.com (No
relation) |
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FALSELY ACCUSED
IN NORTHERN CALIFORNIA?
If you've been
falsely accused of domestic
violence, sexual abuse,
child molestation, or other
crimes of a sexual nature,
contact
The Law Offices of Douglas
R. Slain. Slain is a
specialist who has worked
for over 30 years to defend
falsely accused men and
fathers. To learn
more, click
here,
or call 800-438-6820. |
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'No matter what happens, Daddy will be there'
 Michelle,
the director of my daughter's superb preschool,
gave me this book as a gift when my daughter was
four or five. I had expressed my irritation at the
many "dad as idiot" children's books, like the anti-male
Berenstain
Bears series.
Michelle sympathized, and got me Lois G. Grambling's
Daddy Will Be There, a sweet children's
book about a dad and his little girl.
Remarkably, in the book the dad actually manages
to care for his daughter all by himself, without
a wife to show him how to parent and explain how
he's doing everything wrong.
The New York Times says:
"A young girl plays in her room, learns to ride
a bicycle, goes to a birthday party and watches
insects in a field, in each case secure in the knowledge
that her father is in the next room or just around
the corner if she needs help. In the final pages,
the confident youngster is smiling broadly as she
goes to kindergarten, brimming with newfound independence
but aware that her dad will be there later when
she steps off the bus. The color illustrations,
by Walter Gaffney-Kessell, leave the father in the
background for the most part, relying instead on
the girl's expressions to reinforce the book's sweet,
pragmatic message about the joys and benefits of
having a dad close at hand."
To discuss this issue on my blog, click
here.
Knock me Over with a Feather--Texas AG Greg Abbott
Screws Up Again
 Background:
Child support enforcement agencies are relentless
with their errors and bureaucratic bungling, and
it's men and fathers who pay the price. Texas Attorney
General Greg Abbott (pictured) often beats his chest
during his frequent crackdowns on low-income fathers
he labels "deadbeat dads," but I get more complaints
about screw-ups and abuses regarding his office
as I do about CS enforcement in all other 49 states
combined. To learn more about Abbott, click
here.
It seems that if you're a Latin guy in Texas
or California and your last name is Garcia or Lopez,
sooner or later child support enforcement is going
to get you mixed up with someone else and start
taking your money. And let's be clear--in the case
below, the error was apparently resolved in reasonable
time only because a local TV station got involved.
Money being taken out of check for nearly two months
(KRGV 5, 12/7/07)
HARLINGEN - A Harlingen man is paying child support
for children he doesn't have.
Ricardo Garcia says money has been taken out
of his monthly check for almost two months.
He tells us, "In the process of refinancing our
house, they showed us the paperwork that the government
was taking child support from my checks."
Garcia and his wife, Monica, have been married
for more than 15 years. They have two children in
high school. Garcia doesn't have any other children
and have never been in trouble for child support
payments.
But every week, $30 to $40 was being taken out
of his paycheck.
Garcia called the Attorney General's Office.
But he says he got nowhere.
"It kind of upset me. Because I already knew
that name was very common," says his wife. "I never
knew it would come to this."
Garcia tells us, "They were saying someone was
falsely using my identity. Then it ended up being
my driver's license, then my social security card.
So they weren't really clear on what exactly it
was."
NEWSCHANNEL 5 called the Attorney General's Office
in Austin. A spokesperson for the Child Support
Division admits they've got the wrong guy.
She tells us these things take time and they
hope to get everything worked out in the next month.
Garcia says he hopes things get worked out quickly.
For now, he warns other people with common names
about the situation. He says, "Check your background
at least once or twice a month to make sure they're
not getting falsely accused of anything"...
To read more and to discuss this issue on my
blog, click
here.
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HELP FOR
NORTHERN CALIFORNIA
FATHERS
If you're
a father in Northern
California who's
going through a
divorce or its aftermath
and need legal help,
contact
The Law Offices
of Douglas R. Slain.
Slain, a graduate
of Stanford Law
School, has over
30 years of experience
in family law and
criminal defense.
He can help you
protect your relationship
with your kids and
your finances.
To learn
more, click
here,
or call 800-438-6820. |
Jeff Leving's New
Book--Divorce
Wars
Jeffery M. Leving,
one of America's
most prominent divorce
lawyers, has written
a new book on how
to win any divorce
fairly, even when
your spouse brings
out the heavy artillery.
Divorce Wars: A
Field Guide to the
Winning Tactics,
Preemptive Strikes,
and Top Maneuvers
When Divorce Gets
Ugly provides
essential advice
on everything from
picking the right
lawyer and devising
a winning settlement
strategy to getting
the most from your
day in court and
dealing with an
ex-spouse.
Divorce Wars
is available
here. |
Help, Resources
for Dads
The
National Fathers'
Resource Center
is a division of
Fathers For Equal
Rights, Inc.
(FER), located in
Dallas, Texas, with
offices in both
Dallas and Houston.
In existence for
over three decades,
it has services
and resources for
dads nationwide
and is one of the
largest and most
active fathers'
rights organizations
in the U.S.
www.fathers4kids.org
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Ann Richards, on Her Father
"I've always had the feeling that I could do
anything; my daddy told me I could, and I was in
college before I found out he might be wrong."--Ann
Richards, feminist and governor of Texas, 1991 to
1995.
To discuss this issue on my blog, click
here.
'I Wish You'd Open up to Me--I Need Some Ammunition'
 
New Yorker cartoonist William Haefeli
often has dead-on observations about the way some
women treat their husbands.
To discuss this issue on my blog, click
here.
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Families Against Confiscatory Child
Support (FACCS)
FACCS is the national voice for
fair and reasonable child support.
FACCS believes all parents have
an obligation to support their children
financially. However, in high income
cases, state and federal laws often
result in excessive awards that
are effectively alimony in disguise
and have little to do with supporting
children. Huge child support awards
lead to protracted custody disputes,
undermines co-parenting, and leaves
children worse off financially.
www.faccsonline.org /
contact@faccsonline.org
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Fathers & Families News Digest, 12-11-07
 Below
are some recent articles and items of interest from
Fathers & Families' latest News Digest.
26 arrested in raid over child support allegations
(Courier-Post, 12-6-07)
Holidays a high time for divorce (Atlanta
Journal Constitution, 12-6-07)
Rhode Island court denies same-sex divorce plea
(Reuters, 12-7-07)
The plight of divorced dads (National Post,
12-8-07)
Arizona coach Olson files divorce petition (Baltimore
Sun, 12-8-07)
Correct Call: Free divorce lawyers? State court
says no (The Columbian, 12-8-07)
Holiday sweep nets $354,000, and 1,020 deadbeat
parents (NorthJersey.com, 12-9-07)
Meditation can make divorce more tolerable (TheDay.com,
12-9-07)
New Mexico advocate for dad's rights takes on child
support (Albuquerque Tribune, 12-10-07)
To discuss this issue on my blog, click
here.
Mark Twain, on His Father
"When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant
I could hardly stand to have the old man around.
But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how
much the old man had learned in seven years."--Mark
Twain, novelist
To discuss this issue on my blog, click
here.
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Help for Houston Fathers
The Law Offices of Thomas
A. Martin helps fathers
with Family Law and Criminal
Defense in Houston and surrounding
areas. Martin handles divorce,
child custody, alimony,
domestic violence, restraining
orders and a wide variety
of issues fathers face.
www.thomasamartin.com |
Help for Seattle
Fathers
The Law Offices of O. Yale
Lewis III is a one-person
law firm that focuses on
customer care. Mr. Lewis
can help you identify and
focus on the outcome that
you want and implement the
steps necessary to get there.
www.yalelewislaw.com.
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Saturday Night Live Sexual Harassment PSA
 Background:
We've discussed the general subject of sexual harassment
and men looking at women lately, as a result of
an incredible New York bill proposed over the summer
which would make gawking at women a crime. To learn
more, see my blog posts
Incredible
New NY Bill Will Make Staring at Women a Crime
and
Female Reader Has Interesting Perspective on NY
Bill to Make Staring at Women a Crime.
John, a reader, recently sent me
a funny Saturday Night Live spoof sexual harassment
PSA starring New England Patriots quarterback Tom
Brady.
The PSA makes the point that often
sexual harassment depends on the woman's view of
her "harasser." It's far more likely that a low-status
or unattractive man will be seen as a "harasser"
than a high-status/attractive man.
To watch the video, click
here.
To discuss this issue on my blog, click
here.
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Divorce and Family Consultant
Jayne A. Major, Ph.D. Helps
Parents all over the United
States
Dr. Major, founder of Breakthrough
Parenting Services, Inc.,
helps dads all over the
US with Parental Alienation
Syndrome, child custody,
preparing for psychological
evaluations, dealing with
personality disorders including
BPD,
parenting and family relationship
issues, and much more. Contact
her at
jaynemajor@gmail.com
or (310) 823-7846. For more
info., click
here. |
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Need Help with Divorce Debts?
Divorce often brings debt.
Prosperity Financial can
help. Prosperity Financial
offers Debt Consolidation
(CCCS), Debt Settlement,
a Student Loan Consolidation
program, and much more.
Negotiate lower interest
rates, avoid nasty creditors
and improve your credit.
Call 1-888-611-2809 or visit
www.prosperityfinancial.org. |
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His Side with Glenn Sacks Radio Commentary:
Child Support Audit Finds Fathers Wrongly Punished
  My
recent His
Side with Glenn Sacks radio commentary
for KLAA AM 830 in Los Angeles
discusses a recent
Missouri child support auditor's finding that 27%
of the state's 240,000 child support cases have
incorrect balances. Some of the errors have gone
unfixed for nearly a decade, and have led to enforcement
action against innocent men.
To listen to the commentary, click
here.
To learn more, see
Truth-Telling
Child Support Auditor Susan Montee Under Fire from
CS Industry.
His Side with Glenn Sacks radio commentaries
are broadcast daily on KLAA AM 830, a 50,000 watt
talk station in Los Angeles and Orange County. KLAA
AM 830 is owned by Arte Moreno, owner of the Los
Angeles Angels of Anaheim. KLAA hosts include Glenn
Beck and Michael Savage.
From 2003-2005,
His Side with
Glenn Sacks ran in a syndicated talk show
format in Los Angeles, New York City, Boston, Seattle,
and other cities. To listen to show archives, click
here.
To discuss this issue on my blog, click
here.
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Using Virtual Visitation & Long
Distant Parenting to Manage Family
Separation!
This unique series is designed
to help those who want to maintain
a central role in raising their
children despite being separated.
We will teach you how to use virtual
visitation to strengthen your connection
with children when you cannot be
physically present. The program
also provides a wealth of other
technical information, as well as
simple and effective "low-tech"
methods to reach out to your family
using the telephone, fax machine,
and camcorder. To learn more,
click here. |
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SAMSONLAW--Divorce Lawyers for Michigan
Men & Fathers
If you're a Michigan man faced with
divorce, you need SAMSONLAW on your
side--SAMSONLAW defends men.
Smart Advocacy
Means Stopping Oppression
Now.
INeedSamson.com |
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Postcards from Splitsville (Part III)
 The
drawing is taken from Kara Bishop's
www.postcardsfromsplitsville.com. Bishop works
with Children of Divorce, a class run by Tucson,
Arizona-based Divorce Recovery.
The class did an art project that included "sending
away" the frustrations of divorce. The website is
a place where Kara says "children can share their
divorce-related feelings anonymously and parents
can get a new perspective on how this life-changing
experience impacts their children's lives."
To learn more, click
here.
Kara can be reached at
Kara@PostcardsfromSplitsville.com.
To discuss this issue on my blog, click
here.
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The Men's Legal Center--Help
for Men & Fathers
The Men's Legal Center,
Family Law Advocates
specializes in representing
men in Family Law Court
in San Diego. They also
provide guidance and assistance
for fathers all over California.
Contact them at 619.234.3838
or by email by clicking
here. |
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Free US Rx Prescription
Card
Available now to all United
States Citizens at no charge,
to assist with
high cost of prescription
drugs. Save up to 80-90%
today on prescription drugs
This card can be used by
people who have Medicare,
Medicaid, who are insured
or uninsured. Everyone qualifies.
To learn more, click
here. |
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Dance4Equality
Dance4Equality promotes
awareness and advocacy for
equal rights in family law
through the beautiful uniqueness
of dance. Led by Derek J.
Bailey, an enrolled tribal
member of the Grand Traverse
Band of Ottawa and Chippewa
Indians, Dance4Equality
has led protests against
the Michigan family courts
to promote equal protection
for all in family law cases.
To learn more, click
here. |
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National Organization for Marriage--Big $ to Bash
Gays & Gay Marriage, but Not a Dime to Defend Marriage
& Fathers' Rights
 I've
often criticized the Christian Right's policies
on marriage. My complaints are:
1) They ignore the true threat to marriage and
parents' rights--the family law system.
2) They do nothing to defend fathers' rights,
which are particularly vulnerable under the current
system.
3) They bash gays, who haven't done anything
to anybody and deserve to be left in peace.
4) They waste an appalling amount of time and
effort on non-issues like gay marriage while millions
of children have been needlessly separated from
the fathers they love and need.
The latest is a new New Jersey campaign from
the National
Organization for Marriage. Conservative columnist
Maggie Gallagher, an otherwise intelligent lady
who has inexplicably decided to fritter away her
time on gay marriage, recently sent
Opponents of gay marriage launch all-out N.J. campaign
(Newark Star-Ledger, 11/29/07) out to her
elist. The article states:
"A national campaign to block gay marriage came
to New Jersey this week as conservative groups began
airing radio advertisements and bombarded a key
lawmaker's office with as many as 200 phone calls
an hour.
"The National Organization for Marriage debuted
a radio ad warning 'powerful special-interest groups
want to redefine marriage,' and the N.J. Family
Policy Council sent out an e-mail urging people
to phone legislative leaders and Gov. Jon Corzine.
"Leaders of both organizations said they were
trying to block an effort to legalize same-sex marriage
during the lame-duck session of the Legislature
that ends Jan. 8, when new lawmakers are sworn...
"Brigid Harrison, a professor of political science
and law at Montclair State University, said the
anti-gay marriage campaign may be aimed not just
at lawmakers, but at voters casting their ballots
in the presidential primary on Feb. 5.
"'This is something that is a wedge issue,' Harrison
said. 'It drives people to the polls.'"
While the NOM is wasting time and sizeable sums
of money bashing gays and gay marriage, New Jersey
marriages are being shredded and fathers are being
manhandled in family courts. A few examples:
1) Earlier this year a New Jersey
Supreme Court ruling did away with even the pretense
of meaningful judicial oversight of restraining
orders (aka protection orders). According to
After-Hours E-Filing Allowed for Domestic Violence
Cases, TROs (New Jersey Law Journal,
7/24/07), all that is now needed for a restraining
order is for the woman to give testimony over the
phone to an on-call judge. The judge then issues
the order electronically, so it's immediately enforceable.
In other words, all a woman has to do is pretend
to be frightened over the phone and her husband
gets booted out of his own home and will be arrested
if he tries to visit or call his own children. To
learn more, see my blog post
New
Jersey Does Away with Any Pretense of Meaningful
Judicial Oversight of Restraining Orders.
2) A recent New Jersey appeals
court reaffirmed a decision mandating that a man
must pay alimony to his ex-wife--who killed
their son. To learn more, see my blog post
She
Killed His Son but He Must Pay Her Alimony
3) Sharp anti-father custody bias. For example,
in the study "Child custody arrangements: a study
of two New Jersey counties" published in the
Journal of Psychiatry & Law, New Jersey mental
health experts researched hundreds of custody cases
in two New Jersey counties, Bergen (one of the wealthiest)
and Essex (one of the poorest). Rich man or poor
man, for these New Jersey fathers it didn't matter--in
either county they won custody in only one out
of every 20 cases.
The "defenders of marriage" at the NOM probably
don't have a clue about any of these cases and about
the myriad ways children are being separated from
decent, loving fathers in family court. It's not
as important as the "threat" from gays...
To read more and to discuss this issue on my
blog, click
here.
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Online Dating Rights
Online Dating Rights
opposes the new federal
International Marriage Broker
Regulation Act, which requires
Americans who seek to meet
foreigners via the internet
to have a criminal background
check and an intrusive report
about intimate details of
one's life BEFORE any communication--the
first time in US history
that such checks have been
required.
www.onlinedatingrights.com
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His Side with Glenn Sacks Radio Commentary:
'Choice for Men'
My
recent His
Side with Glenn Sacks radio commentary
for KLAA AM 830 in Los Angeles
argues that "Roe
v. Wade for Men" plaintiff Matt Dubay has a point
in asserting that it is also wrong to force a pregnancy
on an unwilling father."
To listen to the commentary, click
here.
To learn more, see my co-authored column
Respect a Man's Choice, Too (AlterNet,
8/1/06).
His Side with Glenn Sacks radio commentaries
are broadcast daily on KLAA AM 830, a 50,000 watt
talk station in Los Angeles and Orange County. KLAA
AM 830 is owned by Arte Moreno, owner of the Los
Angeles Angels of Anaheim. KLAA hosts include Glenn
Beck and Michael Savage.
From 2003-2005,
His Side with
Glenn Sacks ran in a syndicated talk show
format in Los Angeles, New York City, Boston, Seattle,
and other cities. To listen to show archives, click
here.
To discuss this issue on my blog, click
here.
Memorial Foundation Created to Honor Hero Father
James Kim
 "James
Kim put himself through a desperate ordeal, climbing
down a ravine over boulders and logs, through nearly
impenetrable brush and in and out of an icy creek,
in what one rescue leader called a 'superhuman'
effort to save his family."--San Francisco Chronicle
Background: In December of last year, hero
father James Kim (pictured) gave his life trying
to save his wife and kids. Kim, his wife, and two
daughters took a winter vacation in Oregon but took
a wrong turn and found themselves stranded in snow
and lost on an obscure backroad.
To learn more, see my blog post
James
Kim: Hero Father.
Some of James Kim's co-workers at
www.CNET.com
put together a short memorial video for Kim, featuring
clips of Kim discussing his work and also his little
daughters, and have reposted it on the anniversary
of Kim's death. To watch it, click
here.
In his honor, James' family and friends have
established the James Kim Technology Foundation.
The foundation provides San Francisco public schools,
and the children who attend them, access to emerging
technologies like the ones James covered every day
for CNET.com and Crave. To learn more about the
James Kim Technology Foundation, go to the foundation's
website at
http://www.jameskimtechfound.org/.
To discuss this issue on my blog, click
here.
UK Survey: 1 in 4 children do not consider
their fathers as immediate family
 Amazing
but not surprising--a press release from
the UK shared parenting group Families Need
Fathers said "1 in 4 children do not consider
their fathers as immediate family":
"BBC Newsround's 35th Anniversary Survey
has found that 1 in 4 children do not consider
their fathers as immediate family. Although
this figure is alarming, Families Need Fathers
are not surprised by these findings - the
number of children who don't see their fathers
as part of their immediate family is broadly
the same as the number who live in lone-parent
households. Children who are growing up
not living with their fathers are hardly
likely to think of them as close family.
"John Baker, FNF Chair, said of the survey's
result:
"'This is an example of how society's
continued marginalization of fathers is
affecting children's perspectives on the
roles of men and women as parents. This
is a real wake up call for the country and
our politicians.'"
To read more and to discuss this issue
on my blog, click
here.
 Help
for Los
Angeles/Ventura
County Dads
Certified
Family Law
Specialist
Peter M.
Walzer was
one of the
key figures
in our successful
legislative
struggle
to preserve
the LaMusga
move-away
decision.
As Chair
of the State
Bar of California
Family Law
Section
Executive
Committee,
Walzer lobbied
the state
legislature
to improve
California
laws on
child support
and child
custody.
He's an
American
Academy
of Matrimonial
Lawyers
Fellow who
has authored
numerous
articles
on custody
issues,
business
valuation
in marital
dissolutions
and spousal
and child
support.
www.California-Divorce.com
|
LaMusga
Divorce
Financial
Planning
Divorce
brings about
a myriad
of financial
challenges
and changes.
Often divorcing
couples
make important
decisions
in a rash
manner,
with emotions
impairing
their judgment.
These decisions
may at times
serve the
parties
well in
the short-term,
but can
result in
damaging
and unnecessary
long-term
financial
hardships.
Gary has
successfully
completed
the training
and testing
required
for designation
as a Certified
Divorce
Financial
AnalystTM
and can
assist you
and your
attorney
in the process.
To learn
more, click
here
or call
925-287-1567.
Tracking
Number
6790, DOFU
11/07 |
|
|
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The 'Jennifer Love Hewitt Looks Fat in a
Bikini' Controversy
 
Feminists are up in arms over the "Jennifer
Love Hewitt looks fat in a bikini" controversy,
and I'm inclined to agree with them. TMZ.com
recently ran a photo of Hewitt in a bikini
(above left) with the observation "We know
what you ate this summer, Love--everything!"
Hewitt fired back at critics who poked fun
at her bikini body, saying:
"I've sat by in silence for a long time
now about the way women's bodies are constantly
scrutinized. To set the record straight,
I'm not upset for me, but for all the girls
out there that are struggling with their
body image. A size 2 is not fat! Nor will
it ever be. And being a size 0 doesn't make
you beautiful. What I should be doing is
celebrating some of the best days of my
life and my engagement to the man of my
dreams, instead of having to deal with photographers
taking invasive pictures from bad angles.
To all girls with butts, boobs, hips and
a waist, put on a bikini - put it on and
stay strong."
The prominent feminist blog
Feminist writes:
"Hewitt had the audacity to appear in
public in a bikini while also in possession
of a body that hadn't been dieted and exercised
down to nothing or airbrushed to smooth
perfection...I'm very pleased that she recognizes
that fat-shaming is designed to keep women
in line."
A few observations:
1) As Hewitt notes, it's not the most
flattering picture, but as a whole Hewitt
still looks damn good to me. I can see why
women would think "If even that's
too fat, what hope is there for the rest
of us?" There is such a thing as fat and
unattractive, but this ain't it.
2) The photo above right is an example
of what I don't like--the Auschwitz
look. The blond woman in green at
the bottom of the photo looks like she hasn't
eaten in weeks. I never understand why so
many people want to do away with women with
womanly curves and replace them with women
with skinny, 15 year-old boy bodies. My
wife says it's because fashion designers
can design clothes easier for women with
flat bodies that aren't curvaceous.
3) I doubt that "fat-shaming" is a patriarchal
conspiracy designed to "keep women in line,"
but the feminist bloggers are much smarter
at detecting said conspiracies than I am.
4) I'm happy that Hewitt says she wants
to "celebrate some of the best days of my
life and my engagement to the man of my
dreams"--isn't that what the whole mating
game is supposed to be about anyway?
To discuss this issue on my blog, click
here.
Feminist Author James Sterba Wants to Jail
Men for Not Using a Condom
 In
general I see feminists as merely misguided
and not intentionally malevolent, but there
are some times when it's hard. This is one
of those.
According to
www.infozine.com, in
this recent debate, Notre Dame philosophy
professor and pro-feminist author
James Sterba (pictured) expressed the
following sentiments:
"Sterba, for example, wants to strengthen
the legal definition to make it easier to
prosecute cases in which the woman is drunk
or the victim of 'emotional coercion.' And,
to the bemusement of the audience, he introduced
an idea to criminalize the first act of
unprotected sex between non-married individuals.
"'You could be charged with a crime of
reckless sex,' he said...
"He defended the idea, which he said
was not originally his own, for both its
use in deterring date rape and the spread
of sexually transmitted diseases."
Sterba wasn't just tossing out an idea
off the top of his head--a couple years
ago law professors Ian Ayres and Katherine
Baker proposed the crime of "Reckless Sex,"
wherein a "defendant would be guilty of
reckless sexual conduct if, in a first sexual
encounter with another particular person,
the defendant had sexual intercourse without
using a condom." The penalty for the
"guilty" man would be up to six months in
jail. The authors say their proposal would
help increase condom use and the "quality
of communication in first sexual encounters"
and thus "reduce the spread of sexually
transmitted disease and decrease the incidence
of acquaintance rape."
It is hard to see feminists as being
well-intentioned when they want to criminalize
men and boys for not using a condom, for
getting drunk and having sex, or for having
sex after using "emotional coercion." I
listen to stuff like this and think of my
15-year-old son and shudder. Think of it--if
my son has sex without a condom, or with
a girl who claims he "emotionally coerced"
her, and Sterba, Ayres, and Baker want
him to go to prison.
We debated this issue with Baker on
His Side with Glenn Sacks a couple
years ago--to listen to the show, see
Criminalizing 'Reckless Sex'--Safeguard
for Women or New Way to Herd Men Into Jail?
To learn more:
Ian Ayres and Katherine Baker:
A Separate Crime of Reckless Sex
Can the Law Regulate Sex?: Katherine Baker
and Cheryl Hanna debate
Criminalizing Reckless Sex (New
York Times, 12/12/04)
TalkLeft on Reckless Sex
To discuss this issue on my blog, click
here.
 Dr.
Warren Farrell's Shared
Parenting Evidence Kit--What
You Need to Win Shared Physical
Custody
Dr. Warren Farrell, a top
expert on children of divorce
now offers a complete evidence
kit to help you win shared
custody. The DVDs,
audio CD and electronic
files summarize the best
scientific research available
collected over decades.
Scientific research has
proven that children do
far better with near equal
time with both parents with
minimal conditions.
This video set was developed
to educate parents, judges,
lawyers, psychologists and
other divorce professionals.
Most judges are doing exactly
what is worst for children
with sole-custody.
Submitted as evidence this
will maximize your chances.
Divorce Reform groups call(508)
381-1450 to use as fundraiser.
www.BestInterestofChildren.org |
 |
Help for Michigan Dads
Michigan family law
attorney Mindy L. Hitchcock
has experience fighting
for noncustodial parents
against Michigan's abusive
FOC. Her
holistic approach to
divorce gets results for
her clients while avoiding
the scorched earth approach
to law that leaves families
emotionally and financially
devastated.
Lady4Justice.com
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TV News Reports Woman's Excuse for
Her Domestic Violence Even Before
It Mentions the Violence
 "My
toughest fight was my first wife."--Former
World Heavyweight Boxing Champion
Muhammad Ali
Research shows that women are
as likely to attack their male partners
as vice versa, and that a third
of domestic violence inquiries are
suffered by heterosexual men. I've
often emphasized that domestic violence
is a lot more than a man and a woman
fighting in a kitchen-turned-boxing
ring, and that female abusers often
use the element of surprise to balance
the scales. When you live with someone,
there are an endless number of possibilities
if you want to harm them.
This new Tampa case is yet another
example. According to
Husband wakes to hot grease from
wife:
"Tanesha Young, 24, thought her
husband was cheating on her, so
she poured hot grease all over him.
That's according to a report from
Tampa Police.
"After Antone Neely fell asleep,
Young poured hot grease on him that
burned the majority of his body.
"Young is being held without
bond at the Hillsborough County
Jail and has been charged with aggravated
battery with great bodily harm.
"The husband remains at Tampa
General Hospital."
Nice that the reporter was able
to get the woman's justification
for her crime right there at the
beginning of the sentence, before
the crime is even mentioned. Nor
does the story or the others I've
seen mention the phrase "domestic
violence."
Wayne, the reader who sent me
the piece, says that various news
sites have reported this crime and
that "those sites that allow comments
have a disturbing number of 'cheating
bastard got what he deserved' type
of comments."
Interestingly, this is similar
to what happened to singer Al Green.
According to
VH1:
"At the height of his popularity,
Green's former girlfriend, Mrs.
Mary Woodson, broke into his Memphis
home in October 1974 and poured
boiling grits on the singer as he
was bathing, inflicting second-degree
burns on his back, stomach and arm...Green
interpreted the violent incident
as a sign from God that he should
enter the ministry."
To discuss this issue on my blog,
click
here.
[Note: If you or someone
you love is being abused, the
Domestic
Abuse Helpline for Men and Women
provides crisis intervention and
support services to victims of domestic
violence and their families.]
| | |
My new co-authored column, 
Background:
Research demonstrates
that a significant
percentage of allegations
of sexual assault
are false. To learn
more, see my recent
column
As
pollster George
Gallup commented,
"...drafting fathers
would lead to the
breaking up of too
many families where
there are children."
